An NHL Rookie Waited 10 Years To Get Revenge On Alex Ovechkin For A Childhood Grudge

Miles Wood, despite his name that is perfectly suited for a porn career, is a 21-year-old rookie forward on the New Jersey Devils. But before he was a professional athlete living the dream, he was a boy who wanted one thing more than anything else — an autograph from Washington Capitals superstar Alex Ovechkin.

Randy Wood, Miles’ dad and a former NHL player that also has a pretty good name for porn acting, told the story of young Miles sending Ovechkin a letter requesting an autograph along with a hockey card and a self-addressed, stamped envelope. According to Randy, the letter from Miles was more threatening than bashful.

“If you don’t sign this and send it back to me, when I make it to the NHL, I’m going to give you a big body check.”

Ovechkin never returned the card with an autograph.

Whether that rejection fueled Miles to make the NHL to seek revenge against Ovechkin is mere speculation, but he got that opportunity Thursday night. The Devils beat the Capitals 2-1 in a shootout, although it does not appear that Wood delivered any sort of body check to Ovechkin. But when Ovechkin got wind of the story, he had fun with it.

It reads, “Take it easy tonight!!!” and since Wood did not murder Ovechkin in what would have been an amazing long con in a plot to exact revenge for childhood trauma, I guess he did take it easy. Ovechkin even posed for a picture with Wood while on his way to a hot tub-centric orgy in 1976, apparently, and apologized for the oversight.

This is a good lesson for the kids. If you don’t get that autograph from your favorite whatever, use it as fuel to get to a place where you can destroy that person at their own game. This can work for sports, battles of bands and maybe even in medicine, as you can cure something before that jerk doctor who didn’t autograph your surgical mask when you were 7 years old.

(New Jersey Devils on Twitter)