The only thing better than hucking an axe at something is doing it when you’re blitzed on tasties that makes your tummy all warm and tingly inside.
Axe-throwing clubs are popping up all around the country, promising you the chance to do some damage with cold hard steel affixed to a wooden handle. There is, of course, alcohol involved. In fact, Flying Axes in Louisville, Kentucky didn’t make itself known to the public until it filed for a liquor license with the state. So yes, we should talk about safety for a bit.
Each participant will have the use of a coach who will teach and monitor proper throwing techniques and adherence to safety precautions. Plans call for contests and perhaps leagues, Pennington said, and the venue probably will offer snacks as well as beverages.
Those beverages, of course, are gonna be alcoholic. Hell yes. Get some booze inside me, and let’s make some bad decisions.
These kind of venues always open without a liquor license to get off the ground, but we all know what the end game is here — getting lit and putting holes in stuff. Chicago, Philadelphia, and New York are all catching on to the craze. A place in Buffalo is even called Hatchets and Hops, so at least they’re up front about getting tipsy and hucking steel about.
Of course, we’re not talking Gimli the Dwarf axe play here. The axes are thrown overhead with two hands at a fixed target. So it’s like two-handed, enormous darts. You’re surrounded by fencing and an instructor is, of course, standing by at all times so you don’t maim your friends. It doesn’t leave much room for error.
Still, it’s a useful skill you’ll need when we plunge ourselves into the forthcoming zombie apocalypse. Someday, ammunition will run out. You’re gonna need to know how to jab sharp things into the soft skulls of the undead. May as well learn when you’re nice and loose from a few IPAs.
In the meantime, there’s always time to learn the tao of chopping.
