With all due respect to Kid Rock (which is to say: none), “Justified’s” Raylan Givens is the original American Badass. Played to smarmy, smart, and sexy perfection by Timothy Olyphant, Givens is a U.S. Marshall who’s forced to return to his hometown in Kentucky as punishment for killing someone in the line of duty in Miami. That’s more or less all you need to know (for more information on season, please consult your local Netflix) to get you ready for Season 2, which begins tonight at 10 p.m. on FX.
Here are the ten most badass moments on TV’s most badass show.
#10. The Bludgeon
There are a lot of crappy-but-cool ways to die. For instance, props to the guy who passes away while playing an electric guitar on top of a flaming car that drives into a building that’s about to explode. But one of the worst has to be getting bludgeoned to death by a rock in the middle of the desert, a.k.a. The Ángel Maturino Reséndiz.
#9. The Suck
This scene isn’t awesome for the reason it initially looks. Stephen Root may have been getting a blowjob from that poor girl at some point, but at this particular moment, she’s actually just sucking…the poison out of Root’s upper leg from a snake that just bit him. To recap: attractive woman, poisonous snakes, nearly naked Stephen Root. No wonder Ufford likes this show so much.
#8. The Grenade
Obviously, America is badass, and this scene is about as American as they come. You’ve got two former soldiers talking to each other in a VFW Hall, one holding a grenade and the other a bottle of whiskey, while a SWAT team waits to either kill or apprehend the camouflage-wearing grenade holder.
#7. The Cheating
Sleeping with your hot, since-remarried ex-wife (Natalie Zea)? BADASS.
#6. The Almost Fight
Boyd, the one on the left, was the show’s original bad guy, but after a stint in prison, he reforms and starts a more religious, slightly-less-bad life. His father, Bo, is still evil, though, and he comes to Boyd’s camp in the woods to take guns he believes are rightfully his. But Boyd remains quiet on where they’re hidden. In order to get his son talking, Bo orders Henchman Johnny to start punching the crap out of Boyd, who doesn’t retaliate even after punch after punch is thrown. He’s a bloody mess (not Brit-speak; he’s literally bleeding) when Bo takes his gun and tells Boyd to run for the hills. Minutes later, after fleeing, Boyd hears gunshots and comes back to his former camp only to see…
#5. The Bodies
His followers dead and strung upside down from trees. They’re like Nazi wind chimes!
#4. The Ava
I am so sorry. I’ve gone this far without a single mention of Ava, played by Joelle Carter. She’s interested in Raylan and he’s interested in her, but they can’t do the dirty deed because she’s a witness in a crime that Raylan’s supposed to be investigating, which just gives them more incentive. If breaking the SEXY LAW isn’t badass enough for you, how about the fact that he gets the girl while wearing a flannel shirt, jean jacket, and cowboy hat?
#3. The First Shot
The shot that started it all. Raylan is basically Han Solo, and just as we’re introduced to the Half-Witted, Scruffy-Looking Nerf Herder by showing him shooting Greedo, so too do we meet “Justified”‘s hero killing someone. Greedo was a lot manlier than guy in the pink shirt, though.
#2. The Tooth Pull
What’s cooler than a quick draw of a gun and upside down Nazis? Alan Ruck, of course. Best known as Ferris Bueller’s BFF, Cameron, Ruck guest starred on “Justified” as Roland Pike, a former accountant who embezzled money from the mob and now works as a dentist. When an A-hole patient begins complaining about Roland’s office and especially Roland’s girl, the modern-day Marathon Man follows the guy to his car and takes back what’s his: the crowns in the patient’s mouth.
#1. The Bazooka
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: there is nothing more intimidating than a Nazi in a cut-off shirt holding a bazooka.
