‘Boardwalk Empire’ Recap: The 5 Characters Most Likely To Die In The Season Finale

HBO’s Boardwalk Empire is one of the most sprawling and involved shows on TV, with a cast the size of an extra large beer barrel (or at least equal to The Wire). So this season, the show’s fourth, we’ll be breaking down the eight most bloody and boozy moments from every episode…except for last night’s “Havre de Grace.” Today, we’re predicting which characters are gonna get got in the finale.

Eli Thompson

The best bet. Nucky’s on to him (the explosion test before Eli and his family drives away was a nice touch, but also: “There’s a skunk in your cellar”), his son is beginning to take his place, before this season the writers didn’t seem to know what to do with him, he’s so emotionally wound up that he looks ready to fight the wind, and worst of all, he used to write poetry. Do you feel sympathy for Eli? I’d like to say I do, but then I remember how much I hate Willie and how Eli’s ratting out his brother to save his used mildewy Brillo Pad of a son, so…The chapters in Eli’s book are running out (sorry).

Agent Knox

Unless, of course, he can find a way to shake off the “blue-eyed, baby-faced” Agent Knox. Without giving too much away, there’s a shot in the “next week on Boardwalk Empire” promo that confirms a showdown is coming; I can’t imagine heading into season five without at least one of them in the ground.

Chalky White

Theory: Chalky is Superman. He’s seemingly invincible — how many close calls has he survived this season? At least four that I can recall, and that’s not including the time he almost perished from the Ultimate Condescending Fat White Guy Head Pat earlier in the season. Chalky’s once again all alone; he can’t go back to his family, Nucky wants nothing to do with him, Daughter’s on the run, and the man who taught him everything he knows, Oscar Boneau, was murdered. His parting bit of advice: don’t trust anyone but yourself. Not that he has anyone trustworthy left (except Richard?). So it’s back to Jersey Chalky goes, to the two powerful men who want him dead — there ain’t nowhere left to flee.

Gillian Darmody

Jesus. Gillian was the only human alive gullible enough to not realize that her “husband” Roy was pretending to be someone he’s not, though I didn’t think he was a detective investigating Roger McAllister’s murder, but still: jesus. He got her clean, he gave her a reason to live, he was her escape, and then it was all taken away, and I momentarily set aside all my issues with Gillian. She’s not a good person, but she seemed so emotional fragile in that moment that her arrest didn’t feel cathartic; it was depressing (and with that overheard shot, beautiful). Gillian’s never been one to fully quit, but she’s in trouble with the law and her momentary reunion with Tommy felt like the end of something. Her life? Could be.

Gaston Means

Obviously, Dr. Narcisse SHOULD be here, following in the bloody footsteps that Gyp Rosetti left last year, and I don’t actually think Gaston will die, but I need to give a special shout-out to, “Who has sent you grim visaged Thuggees?” which is the greatest thing anyone has ever said or will ever say.