The Best Of Anthony Bourdain's UPROXX Live Discussion

It was at the moment Anthony Bourdain said he’s at his happiest when he’s watching “Watching Adventure Time with my daughter” that I realized: y’know, this guy, he’s alright. Actually, that’s not true, I’ve known for awhile now that the Parts Unknown host is awesome — see here and here — but after his UPROXX live discussion yesterday, in which he answered questions about everything from punk rock to fighting fellow chefs, he’s been updated MY BEST FRIEND. He might not be aware of this, but it’s totally true.

Anyway, here are the best Q’s and the greatest A’s from Bourdain’s chat.

@Bourdain, after you come back from your travels, what is the first meal that you usually cook?


I call out for a pastrami sandwich. Or I run over to Shake Shack.



@Bourdain I was told by a chef friend of mine that an owner of a restaurant turned you away when you were visiting a Midwest city due to your past “dickish” ways in NY. Question, do you get turned away a lot due to your time as a chef in NY from people that have had some sort of knowledge of you?


Never happened. Your friend is a lying puddle of shit. I mean that in the nicest way possible.



@Bourdain Do you have a favorite New York Dolls song?


Subway Train. Though maybe….Jet Boy.



@Bourdain – Who has the more punchable face – Guy Fieri or Gordon Ramsey?


I know Gordon. I would NOT suggest trying to punch him. He’s built like a brick shithouse.



@Bourdain: Worst moment during filming?


Throwing up in an airplane bathroom is always unpleasant. Especially when you’re 6’4″


(I just wanted to use this photo.) (Via)

@Bourdain You’ve met a lot of amazing people in your line of work. Are there any people that stick out as a “holy shit” I can’t believe I met them moment?


Bill Murray. Super awkwardly geeked. Could barely speak.



How are you not fat? This is a serious question.


Clean living.



How much food TV do you watch? Do you have any technical pet peeves? Personally, I can’t stand the EXTREME FOOD CLOSEUP or the way they mic the sound of people chewing. Second one drives me completely insane.


Bad lighting. Bad blocking. Careless editing. Witless, uncaring Voice Over writing. Pandering announcer voice. Lying about food that’s obviously horrible. Interviews with “customers”. Hate all of it. Makes my crew particularly killy.



@Bourdain How did you get talked into eating at a Sizzler?!


Sizzler was a PERSONAL story. An important part, for better or worse, of growing up in KTown as a second generation Korean. The scene really had very little to do with what was for lunch– It was more about the place it held in the collective memory of a lot of immigrant families. Plus that meatball taco was pretty funny.



@bourdain whats you favorite meal to make at home.


Pasta. Like a meat ragu with pasta. Or maybe a simple stew. One pot.



@Bourdain: Please answer the question that keeps me up at night.

Just who exactly is in the kitchen with Dinah?


Ron Jeremy



@bourdain…Is there any chain restaurant dish that you secretly love? For instance, I have an affinity for the skillet queso dip at Chili’s and it has been an endless source of shame throughout my life.


I am a secret Popeye’s slut. Did I say that or just think it?



@Bourdain – if you were on death row, what would your last meal be?


Sushi. From Jiro Ono.



@Bourdian What was the worst service moment you’ve had at a restaurant?


The woman rubbing ointment on her skin rash after serving me my sandwich.



@Bourdain – What’s your favourite British TV show?


I liked the original EDGE OF DARKNESS. The original HOUSE OF CARDS. CHEF. The Young ONES. SANDBAGGERS.



@Bourdain – now that Tebow has left the Jets, whom do you see being the new lightning rod on the Jets? Outside the QB position?


Mr. T. They should put Mr. T in as QB.
I’d actually watch the games then.



@Bourdain Any renewed plans to travel to Iran for an episode? It used to be a personal goal of mine to be your guide if you ever went.


Yes. Next year. Definitely.



@Bourdain Beatles or Rolling Stones?


LET IT BLEED. Followed by EXILE.



@Bourdain If they ever send out another Voyager into deep space, and there was a way to include one dish, perfectly preserved forever, to represent Earth’s food for our first alien contacts to sample… what dish would you nominate?


Cool Ranch Doritos and Baconnaise. It will terrify away any possible invaders.




When does the filming start on your buddy cop flick with you, Zamir, and Rippert?


BEVERLY HILLS COP 7. THE REVENGE. ” This Time, It’s For Real”



@Bourdain who would win in a fight Martha Stewart or Julia childs.


Tough call: Martha’s mean–and has jail experience. Julia was in the OSS ( the predecessor to the CIA and presumably had training in close-in hand to hand fighting. Plus Julia had the reach.



@Bourdain Have you pulled any good pranks on the crew, or vice-versa?


Does an upper-deccker count as a prank?



Do you really hate ABBA?


Hate? No. Not like I hate Creed–or Dave Matthews…or Phish or Mumford and Sons.



Celebrity Chef Death Match. Two men enter, one man leaves. Ruhlman or Ripert?


Ripert is a mean sucker puncher. (Also has French military training) He’d feign the handshake and hook him. There is historical precedence for this. Don’t let the Buddhist thing fool you.
Ripert. Round one. KO.
BTW: My wife could beat up Ruhlman. (She HAS, in fact!)



@bourdain Is Avocado & Peanut Butter an acceptable combo for a wrap? What else could I add to give it more zest?





when were you the happiest?


Watching Adventuretime with my daughter. A few days ago.



Do you think you can edit the animal masscare’s from the new shows? I couldn’t watch last night after seeing and hearing that goat screaming. Very disturbing.


So…you basically dont want to know where your food comes from? You’d rather have someone else do it?
We should feel a bit uncomfortable. We owe it to the animals we eat.



@Bourdain You travel to many developing nations and feature the locals. Do you ever feel your show is exploitative? Do you support any charities? (just throwing in a relatively serious question after my previous nonsense)


FOOD BANK NY. DC Central Kitchen. Bronx Academy of Letters. Red Hook Initiative. Medecins Sans Frontiers.

Exploitatiove? We try hard not to be–but by virtue of shooting in places like the Congo? Probably can’t help but be guilty of that a little. Anythime you are shooting pictures of people in desperate or impoversihed circumstances and you have an agenda–like making TV. You are, unfortunately, guilty of “exploitative” behavoir. Whatever may be in your heart–or whatever your intentions.

Just go here.