Scandal (ABC, 9:00 p.m.) — “Daddy issues” might not quite be enough to do Olivia’s new situation justice considering that her father just escaped from prison and all…
The Blacklist (NBC, 9:00 p.m.) — The hunted become the hunters when Red and Liz try to track down an adviser to The Director while Tom is looking to find a Tyler Durden character to help Liz out.
How to Get Away with Murder (ABC, 10:00 p.m.) — Annalise and Co. are tasked with defending a client accused of bullying someone to suicide. Just be nice to everyone, you guys. We’re all in this together.
The Big Bang Theory (CBS, 8:00 p.m.) — New night alert! Sheldon lets it slip that he had a ring for Amy and Bernadette kicks Wolowitz in the feels while they’re remodeling his childhood home.
Nathan for You (Comedy Central, 10:00 p.m.) — Nathan’s version of “a walk’s as good as a hit” has the owner of an antique shop trying to attract drunk customers who would be susceptible to her strict, “you break it, you buy it” policy.
The Vampire Diaries (The CW, 8:00 p.m.) — Damon tries to behave himself, and Enzo and Bonnie bicker as the latter learns some unfortunate history involving the Phoenix stone.
Bones (FOX, 8:00 p.m.) — Bones goes full House of Cards when the body of a U.S. Senator gets caught in a street sweeper.
Heroes Reborn (NBC, 8:00 p.m.) — Miko’s origin story and Carlos’ military service record are revealed as Erica and Renautas get the ball rolling on their evil plan. *Maniacal laughter*
Sleepy Hollow (FOX, 9:00 p.m.) — Ichabod is Abbie’s career Sherpa, which is super helpful considering that she’s got her hands full trying to thwart the iconic monster Pandora just turned loose to haunt the townspeople.
Elementary (CBS, 10:00 p.m.) — The fourth season premiere is basically a dramatic re-enactment of that insufferable John Deere Gator commercial where the dad is all holier-than-thou as he tows his son’s truck out of a ditch. “He doesn’t need your help… until he does.” Holmes’ estranged father comes to New York to help him with his legal predicament.
Benders (IFC, 10:00 p.m.) — Paul finds Karen’s diary, and Sebalos develops just (pause) a little crush (pause) on his masseuse.
Thursday Night Football (NFL Network, 8:25 p.m.) — The Browns and the Bengals play on Thursday Night Football, which is only being broadcast on NFL Network this week. Thanks for nothing, Big Bang Theory.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Bryan Cranston and Shamir on Colbert; Bridget Moynahan, Paul Feig, Nicholas Hytner and The Charlatans on Corden; Martin Short, Saoirse Ronan, Harry Connick Jr. and Stanley Jordan on Fallon; Senator Hillary Clinton and Bob Odenkirk & David Cross on Kimmel; Daniel Craig, Regina King and Donny Deutsch on Meyers.