This Kid Is Huge In Jersey
'Sandman' TV Series Not Happening

Russian X-Men trailer has new footage, Kevin Bacon

By / 03.15.11

"Hey, X, remember when we double-teamed that dragonfly hooker at Beast's bachelor party?" -- "Of course I do, I'm psychic."

For a film being directed by the great Matthew Vaughn (Layer Cake, Kick-Ass), pretty much all the marketing so far for X-Men: First Class has been severely underwhelming. (Though it did give me the idea for this awesome Lobster Dog poster).  The PR department seems obsessed with reminding us that this is indeed a prequel, which is silly given 1) we already know that, and 2) when was the last time anyone saw a good prequel?
Today we have a new Russian trailer which isn’t in English, but does take the novel approach of actually showing some cool footage, including Kevin Bacon in a velvet tuxedo. (The Velvet Tuxedo was my penis’ nickname in high school).   Hey, you ever wonder why they never show the mutants with really crappy mutations?  Like, “I can see 63 seconds into the future while standing in a puddle of my own urine!” or “I can manipulate sourdough bread!” Seems like that should play a more prominent role.

[via BleedingCool]
If you prefer pictures to video, I’ve included a few screencaps. Opens June 3rd.

Jazz Hands: a mutant with super-human levels of fabulosity

This was in the 60s, before the surge in popularity of NBA basketball

If you think that's Kevin Bacon's only velvet tuxedo you are sorely mistaken

So sassy a simple "whatever" can stop flying metal

The audience covering their ears and puking, reminds me of Gwyneth Paltrow at the Oscars.

There's really no substitute for an impeccably-dressed henchman


I want more like this!

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