Because you needed a reminder of why you’re a dick for giving your girlfriend cash on her birthday, pint-sized Canadian pop star Justin Bieber spoiled the bejesus out of his
twin sister girlfriend Selena Gomez on Friday. For starters, Biebs took Gomez to her friend (and cutter) Demi Lovato’s concert at the Nokia Theatre in Los Angeles, where they enjoyed her many hit songs such as “That One Song That Kids Like” and “Your Guess is as Good as Mine.”
But then J-Biebz, the inspiration for the world’s greatest Tumblr page (not counting my Miley Cyrus-inspired page, of course) turned the romance up a notch. He led Gomez to the Staples Center via a private tunnel, because he’s JUSTIN F*CKING BIEBER, and he revealed a table for two at center court, complete with steak dinners, because he’s JUSTIN F*CKING BIEBER.
The major date was inspired by a scene in the Adam Sandler flick “Mr. Deeds,” in which Sandler’s character surprises his date, Winona Ryder, with a date for two at Madison Square Garden. After the superstar couple’s meal, things got even more romantic when “Titanic” began playing on a screen in the arena.
Bieber also Tweeted a little advice to us losers who lack his mad skillz: “Romance isn’t dead. Treat your lady right fellas.” That’s right, bros and dudes, you should totes take advantage of your connections with arena owners and host ludicrous screenings of terribly overrated movies, because your woman expects it of you. Also, you should try to base all of your dates on awful Adam Sandler films and make sure you tell everyone that you wear girls jeans. Oh, and buy her a fake rack, too.
In reality, there’s only one thing a man should ever need to show his woman how much he loves her…