Here’s the latest clip from Snow White and the Huntsman, a movie that looks like what would happen if you stuck a book of fairy tales, a Tapout shirt, and a Disturbed CD into that machine from The Fly and sprinkled them with cocaine. As you watch this, keep in mind that people around town are so high on this project that they already pulled the trigger on another script written by Evan Daugherty, and the studio is already fast-tracking a sequel. Yes, a sequel to Snow White & The Huntsman. Which is interesting, because the most impressive thing about this clip is how thoroughly it was able to convince me what a flaming turd this is going to be in just 38 seconds. Did you know: This made it onto the list of the best screenplays of the year? What could this script even look like?
INT. QUEEN’S CASTLE
Black stalactites fall from the vaulted ceiling, form into stalactite men, and attack. All looks grim until THOR shoulder charges one of them and they instantly disappear.
Come, and avenge your father.
(looking heartburned) YAAAAAAAAAAAH!
It has to have more grunting sounds and ketchup stains than actual dialog, right? Oh man. This is going to terrible. Opens June 1st.