It”s Dave Franco”s birthday!
You mean James Franco?
No, Dave Franco.
James Franco, the actor from “Freaks and Geeks”?
No, Dave Franco, why are you not listening to me? Dave Franco is James Franco”s little brother, and today he turns thirty.
Hmm, something seems fishy here.
Who am I talking to? Good question. Very strange.
Okay, moving on…
I may have just been carrying on a conversation with myself, but I have to admit to that little voice inside my head that something does seems suspicious about this Dave Franco: how could James Franco really have a younger brother who is a little less weird but equally handsome? How could any man be so lucky as to date Alison Brie? He must be hiding something.
So, I did some research on this mysterious younger Franco brother on his supposed “birthday” to expose him for the potentially evil doppelganger/clone/alien/spy he really is. Here is what I found:
Dave Franco IS
1. An actor best known for his roles in: “21 Jump Street”, “Charlie St. Cloud”, “Fright Night”, “Now You See Me”, “Warm Bodies”, and “Neighbors”.
2. A native of Palo Alto, California
3. A Gemini
4. A graduate of University of Southern California (USC)
5. The younger brother of James Franco
Dave Franco IS NOT
1. An alien sent to destroy Earth
2. A James Franco clone created by James Franco to destroy Earth
3. A stack of pancakes that has been bewitched to look like a human (motive unknown)
3. Two children standing on top of one another in a trench coat pretending to be a grown man
5. A James Franco impersonator who works bachelorette parties sent to destroy earth
Do you feel safe now that I”ve assured you that Dave Franco is a harmless actor and not a sinister threat to our planet?
Is Dave Franco secretly plotting the destruction of Planet Earth? Is Dave Franco a figment of my imagination? The world may never know.
Happy Birthday, Dave, please let us live.