In case you haven't been paying attention to the real news, Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton reunited in Ibiza, Spain over the weekend at designer Riccardo Tisci's birthday party – evidence of which came in the form of a photo posted to Kim's Instagram page. Here's the photo, which Kim captioned: “Reminiscing about the 1st time we went to Ibiza in 2006! @parishilton it was so good to see you & catch up!! Loves it lol“
Ah, 2006. Remember? Paris was Beyonce and Kim was Kelly Rowland. Paris was Regina George and and Kim was Gretchen Wiener. Paris was Lauren and Kim was Lo. Of course, in true Eve Harrington fashion, Kim ultimately usurped her more famous friend by building a reality TV empire, marrying Kanye West and landing on the cover of Vogue – all while Paris continued to release music videos that no one cared about.
But hey, history can teach us a lot, and in that spirit I've compiled a handy list of 7 times Kim had to toil in her former bestie's shadow before finally taking it all. Because lessons.
1. The time Kim gave Paris a foot massage.
Just a little lower. That's it.
2. The time Paris basically told Kim to shut up and Kim was like, “Ok, boss.”
Don't let it happen again.
3. The time they dressed up like slutty milkmaids and Kim gazed upon Paris with naked admiration.
With just a hint of cunning.
4. The time Paris wore the eye-popping blue dress and Kim had to settle for potato-sack beige.
No bold colors allowed, Kim.
5. The time Kim had to laugh uproariously at all of Paris's dumb jokes.
Haha! Lindsay Lohan has freckles and red hair and is fugly! Hahaha!!
6. The time Kim had to clean Paris's closet.
– And then clean it again. – Ok.
7. The time Nicole Richie referred to Kim as Paris's maid.
On second thought, maybe Nicole was the Gretchen Wiener.
But anyway.