Amy Schumer’s ‘Don’t Need No Makeup’ crushes that One Direction song you like

04.29.15 2 years ago

Amy Schumer revealed her breakthrough scientific study on the booty-poop connection with her song parody “Milk Milk Lemonade,” which had fun with booty anthems, Sophie's “Lemonade” and bodily fluids.

Now the “Inside Amy Schumer” star has a boy band song that helps to inform the girl that she's beautiful inside, and she doesn't need that “goop” she calls makeup.

If the tune sounds familiar, that's because it's batting awfully close to One Direction's “What Makes You Beautiful.” Schumer toys with the notion that dudes who prefer “no makeup” might not actually know what that really looks like, but thematically her song pounds away at these “I see you're beauty, even if you don't” feel-good tunes so very condescending.

“You're turning heads when you walk through the door / Don't need make-up, to cover up / Being the way that you are is enough / Everyone else in the room can see it / Everyone else but you.”

Now try on John Legend's “You & I” on for size.

“You fix your makeup just so / Guess you don”t know that you”re beautiful / Try on every dress that you own / You were fine in my eyes a half hour ago / If your mirror won”t make it any clearer I”ll be the one to let you know.”

And how about some Bruno Mars' “Just the Way You Are”:

“Yeah, I know, I know when I compliment her, she won't believe me / And it's so, it's so sad to think that she doesn't see what I see / But every time she ask me do I look okay? / I say / When I see your face / There's not a thing that I would change / 'Cause you're amazing / Just the way you are”

Just as Arianna Rebolini and Robyn Pennachia and I and many others have said: the implication there is an underlying shame and insecurity, and these types of songs reek with a direct marketing to women's insecurities, particularly younger girls like One Direction's audience.

You'll see the trend before you feel it. I only wish “Just the Way You Are” wasn't so damn catchy.

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