‘Big Brother’ finale recap: Who will win the big money?

09.18.13 4 years ago 11 Comments


Tonight’s the night! This isn’t the final three I expected (it never is) but it’s still going to be interesting to see how this plays out. I don’t envy the members of the jury house, as each of these players is so different they will not only have to decide on who had the better game, but they will have to define what they consider good (or at least winning) game play in the first place. 

If Spencer makes the final two, do you give him points just for surviving? For telling Amanda to shut up? Or eliminate him for being racist? If Andy makes it, do you consider his backstabbing savvy brilliant gameplay or do you ding him for floating through most of the competitions (at least until the end, when he found his superpowers)? Do you praise GinaMarie for taking out Amanda, or ding her for screaming at the house when Nick got sent home? Like I said, this will not be easy, and I doubt it will be a unanimous decision.

We pick up where we left off, which was watching our final three hamsters hold on as they’re spun around a rink on roller skates. Gina Marie seems to be the most comfortable on roller skatees, so I think this is hers to lose. And yes, Spencer is out first and Andy looks like a factory farmed chicken on a hook waiting for processing. But suddenly, Gina Marie is struggling when the hamsters get doused in foam. Hey, maybe it’s not hers to win after all! Then, Andy falls and Gina Marie has it. Thank you, editing, for making this look a little less obvious.

Gina Marie is so thrilled, because not only is she assured a spot in the final part of this HoH competition, she’s also covered in glitter. Gosh, “Big Brother,” if we’d known it was this easy to make the girl happy, why didn’t you just drown the chick win Nick left?

The next part of the HoH challenge forces Spencer and Andy to find crabs with the faces of the other housemates printed on them, then line them up in the order in which they were evicted. Oh, and they have to climb a wall to put the house guest crabs in the right spots. 

I would think Andy should find them all, line them up on the ground, THEN climb the wall, which doesn’t appear to be happening. Anyway, he completes his line-up, then  realizes he messed up two housemates so he has to go back and switch them. I still suspect Andy might do better than Spencer, who doesn’t seem like much of a wall climber. 

But wait! Spencer is doing exactly what I thought would be best — lining up the house guests on the ground, then climbing. Unfortunately, this appears to be killing Spencer. He’s digging deep to climb the wall again, thinking of his family, his future, how unhappy his bosses are with the racist stuff. Okay, that last part’s just me.

Times! Andy takes 21 minutes and 54 seconds to complete the challenge. Spencer takes 36 minutes and 11 seconds, and that means Spencer is out. Not out-out, just out of the running for HoH, which might as well be out-out, I think. 

There’s a little time before the final challenge. Andy tries to sweet talk GinaMarie into taking him to final two if she wins HoH. She cries. She thinks Andy can beat her, but he deserves it more than Spencer. And, as we know, she’s loyal! What will she do? If she’s smart, she’ll be disloyal this one time and take Spencer — of course, that’s assuming she wins HoH, which is a big if. 

Dr. Will visits the jury house. Everyone goes wild. Free tattoo removal for everyone! But no time to marvel over Dr. Will’s shoeshine black hair. It’s time to meet juror number eight. Elissa was hoping it would be McCrae, which makes Amanda glare daggers at her. Still, Amanda seems happy to see her “Big Brother” husband, who makes a point of apologizing to Elissa.  Elissa, unfortunately, isn’t exactly gracious but more gloat-y. 

Dr. Will wonders if the time in the jury house has fixed personal problems. Amanda is FINE WITH EVERYONE. Elissa isn’t used to angry people like, oh, Amanda. Candice doesn’t sugarcoat it; she hates Amanda. Amanda tells her she’s holding a grudge. Candice doesn’t care, because she still hates her. I am so sad we couldn’t have been flies on the wall in the jury house, because I hope Candice made Amanda at least a little bit miserable. Weirdly, Aaryn and Candice are now best buds! So, there’s hope for Aaryn yet? Maybe? 

A lot of the girls seem to be rooting for Gina Marie except, of course, Amanda, who feels she wasn’t playing the game. Amanda? Yeah, this would be called holding a grudge. Aaryn thinks it’s great Amanda couldn’t manipulate her. Oh, I wonder if Candice and Aaryn ganged up on Amanda in the jury house. Again, would have loved to see it. Oh, and Candice hates Gina Marie. 

There seems to be a lot of fondness for Andy, despite the backstabbing. McCrae thinks Andy was more tactful and GinaMarie is too blunt. I think it’s hard not to argue that Andy played the better game, even though GinaMarie made one hugely important move in getting rid of Amanda. 

Dr. Will asks about how many people were on the block with Spencer. Aaryn thinks he’s made it far by not getting blood on his hands. Well, yeah, but he never had a chance to get blood on his hands. McCrae and Helen stand up for Spencer, though I don’t get the impression anyone else is really considering him to win this. 

Dr. Will implores the hamsters not to let anyone else influence their votes. Except him. Kidding! He tells them to think hard about what questions they want to ask of the final two. 

The third part of the HoH challenge! It’s a quiz about the jury members. A quiz conducted while Andy and GinaMarie are standing on a big, golden scale. It’s like a weight loss game, but for no good reason!They both answer the first question (about Candice) correctly. And we get helpful video from each juror mentioned in the questions. Just in case we thought Julie was making anything up, I guess. 

They both answer the second question about Jessie incorrectly. D’oh. Ah, third question about Helen — Gina Marie gets it wrong, and Andy takes the lead. The scale is tipping in his favor! They both answer the next question correctly. It’s 3-2, Andy. Another split decision — and Andy gets it right. It’s now 4-2. 

Another split decision — a question about who Elissa found most shocking. Gina Marie gets it right. Closing the gap! They both get the next question wrong. Then, they both get the next question right, and that gives Andy the win. He’s the last HoH and guaranteed to get either $50,000 or $500,000. 

But who will Andy choose to take with him to the jury house? This would be tough, really. There are people who hate GinaMarie, and there are others who feel Spencer wasn’t that important to the game. Hmm…

Time to get blood on your hands, Andy! He chooses to evict… Spencer, as he gave GinaMarie his word on night one he would take her to the final two. 

Spencer doesn’t seem too surprised, and when he walks out of the house he tells Julie he isn’t shocked that Andy dumped him and he has no hard feelings. “He just stuck with GM, and good for him,” he says. 

Julie congratulates him for breaking the pawn curse. Spencer loved every single second of the last ninety days! Spencer seems so nice I almost want to forget those horrible racist things he said, which Julie doesn’t mention, probably because they didn’t end up on the primetime broadcast. I really wish she had either brought them up with everyone who said them or not at all. 

Time for the jurors to take the stage! Helen thinks Andy will win if he makes it to the final two, but she won’t guess as to who might be the next juror. Julie brings the jury hamsters up to speed. Spencer is on the jury. Which they would figure out anyway. Thanks for stating the obvious, Julie! We’re up to speed!

Time for the hamsters to quiz GinaMarie and Andy! I think Helen’s right, that Andy will be hard to beat.

Amanda asks Gina Marie what her biggest game move other than taking her out. GinaMarie says taking her out. Amanda says, um, dummy, I said other than taking me out. GinaMarie says she decided to do it before The Exterminators, so, still her biggest game move. This is what we would call a bad answer. 

Elissa, same question, but for Andy. Andy talks about aligning with Amanda and McCrae, and his ability to play both sides of the house. Better answer.

Helen asks GinaMarie what her biggest obstacle was in the game. GinaMarie says she plays with her heart. so having Nick leave derailed her. Understatement of the year!

McCrae asks Andy why they should vote for his backstabbing ass when he always said he would be a bitter juror if anyone backstabbed him. Andy says he said that to cover his own ass. He wouldn’t have been a bitter jury member! He played a strong strategic game, and he loves everyone so much! Andy lays it on a little thick, but he’s far more articulate than GinaMarie, really. 

Candice asks GinaMarie about why they should give her money when she was such a jerk and called everyone cockroaches. GinaMarie says she was only mean because she was shocked, and she can only be the best GinaMarie she can be, and she loves them all. So… that made her racist, too? Being the best GinaMarie she could be? I’m so confused.

I think GinaMarie is losing this, as Andy is talking circles around her.

Jessie asks why Andy lied to so many people unnecessarily. Andy admits he was a coward. He apologizes to Jessie, but he didn’t want her to be mad at him. He is very good at explaining himself. You can practically see votes changing. 

Spencer asks Andy why he should give him a half million dollars. He says he was loyal to a fault, and he promised GinaMarie he would not backstab her, and he carried through — he kept his word to her throughout the whole game. Thus, he was a backstabber, but not in one important part of the game, which shows he’s well-rounded. 

GinaMarie just smiles a lot. I think she’s already getting excited about having $50,000.  

Final pleas. GinaMarie tells the jurors how cute they are. She talks about how loyal she’s been, and how she’s GinaMarie. Please, please stop telling us you’re just GinaMarie, GinaMarie. We know. She apologizes for being Italian. She also promises parting gifts. Andy says he played the game with his heart AND his mind (GinaMarie, of course, was just GinaMarie). He tells the hamsters he adapted to every situation and how the Exterminators were formed, and how everyone went home because of him. And he loves them all.

Time for the vote. I think Andy has it. Of course, it’s a secret vote right now. I’m plugging in my guesses in parentheses.

Candice votes for someone she loves and respects (Andy). Jessie votes for who played the most consistent game (GinaMarie?). Helen votes for the best game player (Andy). Aaryn votes for the person who’s always been there for her (GinaMarie). Amanda votes for the best person and player in the game (Andy). Elissa is voting for the person who had a flawless social game (Andy). Judd says let the best Exerminator win (who knows?). McCrae hopes whoever wins is buying drinks tonight. Spencer is voting for the person who he felt was the very best player in the game (Andy).

Hey, the other eliminated house guests are in the house! This will be fun! Maybe! Julie asks Amanda who she thinks the MVP was who voted her out. Amanda guesses it’s America. She didn’t think she was so disliked! Alas, walking out to fifty percent boos, she realized yeah, it could be America.

Howard, what surprised you the most? He said the severity of how America took the show. He’s praying for the racists and he hopes they grow up. 

Then, time for Julie to break the news — she tells the jurors they made headlines with their crappy comments. Spencer, what do you think? Spencer thinks it’s terrible. He hates it. “Did I say anything, Julie?” Julie doesn’t have enough time to tell him. So, yes.

Jeremy thought Helen used the mom thing to her advantage and it threw him off. Helen says they were real tears. Helen admits there were some fake tears, but she did cry some real tears. 

Time for America’s favorite houseguest! Oh, well, no. Not really. That’s later. Julie was just faking us out. Gina Marie is screaming for Nick. Run, Nick, run!

Time to reveal the votes! 

Spencer votes for Andy to win.

McCrae votes for Andy to win.

Judd votes for GinaMarie to win.

Elissa votes for Andy to win.

Amanda votes for Andy to win.

Aaryn votes for Gina Marie to win.

Helen votes for Andy to win. And Andy is the winner!

Lots of hugging and silver confetti. And GinaMarie has tackled Nick for a BIG, LONG hug. Oh, poor Nick. Oddly, there aren’t a lot of hugs for Andy. He won, but that doesn’t have to mean the jurors like it, I guess. 

Jessie and Candice also voted for Andy, by the way.

Judd, Elissa and Howard were the top three hamsters for America’s favorite houseguest. The winner? Elissa. Huh. Hey, Amanda, I bet your decision to be such a jerk to Elissa helped propel her to $25,000! Mwahahaha!

So, this wraps up season 15 of “Big Brother,” which Julie wasn’t overselling to call the most controversial in the show’s history. While it’s been interesting and has possibly spurred some conversations about difficult topics, let’s just hope that other seasons aren’t this, shall we say, exciting. It’s rough when you find yourself pining over the days when people just argued about who got the nicer bed and who borrowed whose mascara. 

Are you surprised Andy won? Do you think Nick is frightened or happy? Did you vote for Elissa?

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