‘The Butler’: 20 completely inappropriate alternative titles

This week in studio executives acting like petulant children, Warner Bros. has attempted to block The Weinstein Company’s use of the title “The Butler” for their new prestige movie starring Forest Whitaker and Oprah Winfrey – all because they own the rights to a 1916 black-and-white short film also called “The Butler” that has only been seen by people who are dead now. And guess what? The MPAA actually ruled in Warner Bros. favor. Cue Harvey Weinstein head explosion.

So what’s a bloated, power-hungry studio head to do? Well, appeal of course, because that is a ridiculous verdict, but in the event that the MPAA reaffirms their decision, we’ve got a few alternative titles to suggest. Check them out below, then vote for your favorite in the poll further down and we’ll awkwardly Photoshop the most popular choice onto the film’s official poster.

20 alternate titles for Lee Daniels’ “The Butler”:

1. Mrs. Winfrey Goes to Washington
       
2. The House Boy
       
3. Bringing Tea to Sociopaths
       
4. Who Cares What It’s Called, Forest Whitaker’s In It
       
5. Famous People in Period Clothing
       
6. This Movie Will Uplift You
       
7. The Buttler (but then it would have to be a Kevin James movie)
       
8. The Batler (But then it would have to be a Christian Bale film)
       
9. The Butler: A Feature Film
       
10. The Guy in the Corner in the Bow Tie
       
11. Polishing Abe Lincoln
       
12.  Meet the Help
       
13. Better Than OWN
       
14. Eat Pray Serve
       
15. The Other Butler
       
16. The Subtler Butler

17. The Domestic Worker in a Large Household
       
18.  Everyone’s favorite help
       
19.  Tyler Perry Does Not Present The Butler

20.  34 Years Hired Help

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