Watch: Bad Meets Evil featuring Eminem and Royce Da 5’9’s video for ‘Fast Lane’

If you”re offending every single group possible then do all the insults just cancel each other out?

That”s what I”m trying to figure out after watching the video for “Fast Lane” by  Bad Meets Evil featuring Eminem and Royce Da 5″9.

First, the good part: the video, which features the pair and some friends in a dilapidated warehouse is  fast moving and compelling with Royce spitting out rhymes, as the words appear like cartoons in front of him and he pushes them away.  He shoots at cartoon targets, he hangs the testicles of a cop on an animated unicorn (What is it with unicorns this year? This is the third sighting of the mythical creature after Ke$ha and Lady Gaga”s clips… )

Eminem appears, wearing a Flavor Flav-sized clock and a white track suit, straight out of the ’80s.  He keeps the insults going. I”ve never met Nicki Minaj, but I”m going to go out on a wild limb and guess that hearing that Em wants to put his “penis in your anus” is just not going to go down as one of the greatest c”mons she”s ever received. Certainly, not the most romantic, but I don”t want to assume (we know what that makes me).

Eminem is mainly concerned with making sure he gets serviced. So much so that he threatens a cartoon blonde, “If you don”t fucking  give me head, I”m going to have to take it,”  as he rips off her head. At least he was smart enough not to say that to Minaj, who”d probably make it so that he never had to worry about getting oral sex again.

This is old school Eminem… the one that has no filters and lets the words tumble out with lightning speed, no matter how profane and/or silly they are (such as when he says he”s on a roll and the next word that comes out is “danish.” ).

As Royce told Billboard, June 14″s “Hell: The Sequel,”  the EP which contains “Fast Lane,”  was meant to take both MCs back to their early days together in the ’90s. They first appeared as Bad (Royce) and Evil (Eminem) on Eminem “The Slim Shady EP,” but then had a falling out and didn”t reconcile until a few year ago.

 “A lot of people love the new, more mature, more sober, conquering- his-demons (Eminem),” Royce tells Billboard “But a lot of them want to hear the old, crazier Em from back in the day. So whenever we get together we try to make it as nostalgic as possible, just take it back to when it didn’t matter and we just wanted to rhyme. We wanted to play those characters again. That’s what feels normal to us when we get together.”

Well, if gay-bashing, misogynistic rapping is what you”ve been hankering for, then this is meant just for you.

As for the song, “A Kiss,” which also appears on the EP and in which Eminem declares Lady Gaga that she “can quit her job at the post office/she”s a male lady,” Royce says it”s all just a joke.
 
“(Eminem) has a great sense of humor,” Royce says. “He’s been doing that type of thing his whole career. It’s one of the things that makes him great. I laughed when I heard it and told him he was crazy. I definitely don’t think anyone should take it as an insult.”

Here”s the thing. Words do have meanings and they do have an effect. Em and Royce may want to go back in time to what they considered the good old days, but I sure as hell don”t want to join them there, no matter how inviting the beats may be.

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