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Lance Armstrong: Cycling’s Greatest Troll

By 11.12.12

In case you haven’t been paying attention, it’s been a rather rough month for 7-time Tour de France champion first guy to finish, Lance Armstrong, as the International Cycling Union has basically demonized the poor bastard and forever branded him a cheater. Armstrong, of course, “gave up” his fight against the UCI and U.S. Anti-Doping Agency after a supposed wealth of evidence exposed him for using performance-enhancing drugs during his career as the greatest American cyclist to ever squeeze his balls into skin-tight shorts.

Now, Armstrong is officially walking away from the one organization that has been his saving grace to the people who still call themselves fans – Livestrong. After stepping down as the cancer philanthropy’s chairman, Armstrong has now entirely resigned from the board in order to save it from any further embarrassment. But don’t worry, he is gone but unforgotten.

“Lance Armstrong was instrumental in changing the way the world views people affected by cancer. His devotion to serving survivors is unparalleled and for 15 years, he committed himself to that cause with all his heart,” [new board chairman Jeff] Garvey said. (Via USA Today)

And while Armstrong has been stripped of his titles and lost his endorsement deals with Nike and Anheuser-Busch, he’s still reminding everyone that he ain’t care about the haterz. On Saturday, Armstrong Tweeted this photo, part of which you see above, and it looks like he’s sending a little “Kiss my yellow-jerseyed ass” message to the UCI and Anti-Doping Agency.

The responses to the photo are clearly mixed, as one follower Tweeted, “lazy Saturday :) love it!!” and another Tweeted, “yeh but he didn’t win those jerseys clean did he! And was that him laying around? or lying around?” Oh snap, smack talk about his doping AND a grammar correction? Sh*t’s getting real on Twitter, yo.

As far as where we stand on Armstrong in the wake of this scandal and the UCI’s revelations, I am issuing With Leather’s official statement: Kate Upton is very attractive. I know, that’s going to alienate some of our readers, but we’re not afraid to be bold. In the meantime, as an avid viewer and fan of DIY’s House Crashers, I took some time to design some new living room decorations for Armstrong.


TAGSCHARITYcheatersCYCLINGLANCE ARMSTRONGLIVESTRONGPEDSQUITTERSsteroids

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