Did you know that UPROXX favorite Mila Kunis was dating frequent UPROXX punchline Ashton Kutcher? I didn’t! But I do now after seeing pics of the two making out in Central Park — ERRRRR, Mila kissing Ashton while Ashton played with his phone.
Ashton, we feel for you, bro. Mila is — how can we put this? — just so damn clingly. We’ve been there. There you are just wanting to check your @ replies from teenage girls in Nebraska on Twitter and all she wants to do is make love to your face with her tongue while she runs her hands all over your body. So. Annoying. Not to mention gross.
Ashton Kutcher has better things to do with the precious time he has with his smartphone in moments like this. Here are 5 of them.
5. Liking the UPROXX Facebook page.
4. Following UPROXX on Twitter.
3. Checking out the newish UPROXX mobile site.
2. Emailing tips to the UPROXX editors at tips at uproxx dot com.
1. Checking out the cool new UPROXX commenting system features, like the ability to follow and message other commenters, not to mention all the amazing new default avatars that have been created for users.
I mean, who could blame him, after all? OR YOU FOR THAT MATTER?!?! (See what I did there?)