Steve Ballmer’s Trampoline Dunk Makes Us Wish We Owned An NBA Team

The Los Angeles Clippers debuted a horrendous mascot — we had much better ideas — during their game against the Brooklyn Nets on Monday night, but the real travesty is they never needed one to begin with; they already have owner Steve Ballmer. After Monday’s display, it’s clear Steve is everything Chuck the Candor is and so much more besides that.

Part of Chuck’s debut was a classic trampoline dunk and it was just fine, but then Ballmer decided to one-up his team’s new mascot with a trampoline dunk of his own, a move that originated with Celtics coach Brad Stevens, but one which is now invading the ownership suite, as well. The former Microsoft CEO nearly missed the trampoline, but got just enough of it to get up and throw down his dunk, all while making the most intense face ever.

Ballmer will be 60 this month, so I don’t know if it’s a real possibility, but he should probably get rid of that goofy Candor and just throw these down every game to get the crowd riled up. It would be so much more effective, I’m sure of it.