Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter tanks as Schadenfreude Summer Continues

In a summer that has already seen delicious, disastrous bombs for Battleship, Adam Sandler’s latest movie, and Rock of Ages, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter grossed just $16.5 million on a $70 million budget. It seemed like something people were excited for it about three months ago, then in the last couple of weeks public opinion really turned against it. My guess is, people thought it sounded like a fun idea, then changed their minds after being bombarded with ads that didn’t make it seem all that fun (I’d like to think the amazingly terrible Abraham Linkin Park Vampire Hunter video also had an effect). But that could just be me projecting. One thing is for certain, if you really want a movie to bomb, just have me choose it in our Fantasy Summer Box Office game.

[via BoxOfficeMojo]

Elsewhere, Brave topped all other movies with almost $67 million, putting it in a dead heat with Cars 2, which opened last summer to $66.1 million. David Caruso has hopes that in the aftermath, Hollywood will finally see the value in ginger protagonists (seems doubtful). Meanwhile, Focus Features was hoping for $7 million on Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, but ended up with less than $4 million, and even worse, a C+ Cinemascore (read my review here), meaning even the people who purposely sought it out didn’t really like it that much. I didn’t hate it, but I can see why people would (I’d love to see them remake it as a movie just about Patton Oswalt going to apocalypse wine orgies). Either way, it’s time for Steve Carell to stop playing a sad sack loser who can’t get laid. He’s got a lot more range than that, and besides, we all know he loves lamp.

Dark Knight Rises
Total Recall
Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter: 16.5
BOMB PICK: The Raven: $26 million budget – $7 million opening = 19 million
TOTAL: 35.5

The Avengers: $207 million opening
Men in Black 3: 55 million
Ice Age
BOMB PICK: Men in Black 3: 215 million budget – 55 million = 160
TOTAL: 422

Brave: 67
Snow White & The Huntsman: 56
Bourne Legacy
BOMB PICK: Dark Shadows: $150 million – 28 million = 122
TOTAL: 245

Prometheus: 50
GI Joe: Retaliation. The Watch
Madagascar: 60
BOMB PICK: Rock of Ages: 75m budget – 14 = 61
TOTAL: 171

Amazing Spider-Man
Battleship: $25 million
Expendables 2
BOMB PICK: Battleship: 209m – 25m = 184
TOTAL: 209

Keep in mind that I won last year’s pool as you scoff at how badly I’m getting annihilated this year. A blind doberman would’ve made better picks this year.