It’s safe to say that the majority of people who pay attention to movies knew that The LEGO Movie was going to be a huge hit, but what happened this weekend at the box office still deserves to be celebrated by both children and the child at heart. The star-studded animated spectacular opened with a whopping $69 million haul, which is good enough for the second-largest February debut in history behind The Passion of the Christ’s ridiculous $83 million first weekend way back in 2004 AD. If Hollywood has taught us anything in recent decades, it’s that The LEGO Movie will undoubtedly have at least two sequels, but probably closer to a dozen, now that this thing has cash cow written all over it. I, for one, look forward to the straight-to-DVD film, The LEGO Movie X: LEGOs vs. Transformers on Spring Break, directed by Michael Bay Jr. and starring Madonna’s adopted son and Carrot Top.
Obviously, a $69 million opening weekend has probably launched several dozen cocaine parties in the greater Hollywood area, but The Monuments Men still made a respectable showing in second with a $22 million debut. It says a lot about what a great ensemble cast can do to quiet otherwise terrible reviews, but the film still has a long way to go in making up the rest of its $70 million budget (spoiler: The Monuments Men will definitely earn more than enough money.)
So was there any actual bad news at the box office this weekend? Yes, and it’s still great news for the rest of us. Not only did Vampire Academy basically bomb, but it was apparently so terrible that the studio refused to screen it for critics and even forced theaters to cancel all midnight screenings for it last Thursday.
If a midnight screening is on the calendar and people have already purchased tickets, however, it’s complete bullshit to cancel the showing. You should have seen how devastated the poor people I was at the theater with were. They really, really wanted to see the movie. They almost certainly would have tweeted positive things about it whether it was good or not, and yet, they didn’t get that chance, probably because The Weinstein Company got nervous and decided pissing off the most hardcore fans that have been waiting months was a better option than running the risk of a few bad reviews. (Via Mack Rawden at Cinema Blend)
I’m sure I don’t even have to mention that Vampire Academy is already the third movie on a certain list that I update throughout the year for one certain thing that I generally hate/love writing in December, but is it even fair at this point? I mean, we all know what this movie is going to be – an unapologetic ripoff of Twilight that also tries to capture the school vibe of Harry Potter and faction angle of The Hunger Games, all while being unintentionally funnier than any actual genre spoofs – so why even bother reviewing or even mentioning how f*cking terrible these movies are? Because our children deserve better, that’s why. Otherwise, make sure to cast your vote for President Edward Peeta Jefferson in the 2040 election.
Here are the rest of the weekend box office numbers, courtesy of Box Office Mojo…
Normally, I don’t bother with the movies near the bottom of this list, but that total gross on A Madea Christmas is absolutely splendid. I know it won’t stop other Tyler Perry movies from happening, but great effort nonetheless, America.