New York Critics (Minus Armond White) Awarded ‘Boyhood’ Best Film (While Snubbing ‘Birdman’)

The New York Film Critics Circle announced their awards this morning, their first year without three-time former chairman Armond White, who was expelled for allegedly calling Steve McQueen a doorman last year. I know you were all on pins and needles wondering how the preeminent association of New York film critics would ever function without him, but it seems that they did.

As always, the awards were indicated via smoke signal emanating from the sunroof of J. Hoberman’s Miata as the NYFCC leadership drove down the West Side Highway burning R. Kyle Smith’s underpants. White underpants for acting awards, black underpants for directing, as is traditional.

Actually, that part is unsubstantiated, but here are the awards:

BEST PICTURE
Boyhood

BEST DIRECTOR
Richard Linklater, Boyhood

BEST FIRST FILM
Jennifer Kent, The Babadook

BEST ACTRESS
Marion Cotillard, The Immigrant and Two Days, One Night

BEST ACTOR
Timothy Spall, Mr. Turner

SPECIAL AWARD
Adrienne Mancia, longtime film curator at MoMA and BAM

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY
Darius Khondji, The Immigrant

BEST SCREENPLAY
The Grand Budapest Hotel

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Patricia Arquette, Boyhood

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
J.K. Simmons, Whiplash

BEST NONFICTION FILM
Citizenfour

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
Ida

BEST ANIMATED FILM
The Lego Movie

It’s hard to quibble with Boyhood winning anything, because it’s great, but what most jumps out at me is the fact that Birdman got shut out completely. Even for cinematography. I know, that whole “one continuous shot” thing was much too gimmicky, let’s pick the Cannes darling that was only released in 150 theaters instead, you probably haven’t even heard of it. Oh well, I’m sure it’s good. But it’s like I always say, New York and everyone in it can go lick the skidmarks out of my dirty underpants.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eeXtjrHLbTc