PICTURED: Sofia Vergara filming a sex scene with Sharon Stone

Friends, I love nothing more than writing intelligent parody, critical analysis, and cultural criticism for you, and I hope that’s what keeps you coming back, but every once in a while I’m more than content to let the content flash its boobs and soak up page-views speak for itself. Here’s Sofia Vergara’s magnificent, lace-covered breasts in New York yesterday, where she was filming Fading Gigolo with Sharon Stone, which is being directed by John Turturro, and co-stars Woody Allen and Liev Schrieber. Sweet, all the pervs are here.

Fioravante decides to become a professional Don Juan as a way of making money to help his cash-strapped friend, Murray. With Murray acting as his “manager”, the duo quickly finds themselves caught up in the crosscurrents of love and money.

Every time Sharon Stone films a sex scene, I have to wonder if it involves a bathtub full of pee. Maybe she got nicer after her husband got bit by a Komodo dragon? I don’t know. Also, has anyone seen Romance & Cigarettes, John Turturro’s musical with James Gandolfini? It looked… strange. Anyway, long-story short, BOOBS! BOOBS! BOOBS! BOOBS! BOOBS! BOOBS! (*puts on foam cowboy hat, dances jig, fires two pistols into the air, which light a giant banner made of sparklers reading “BOOBS!” as skywriter flies by in biplane*)

Also, question for Spanish speakers: “Verga” is Spanish slang for penis. So couldn’t “Vergara” be taken to mean “penis handler” or “one who works with penises?” “Penis charmer,” perhaps? These are the things that keep me up at night.

[more pics at TheSuperficial]