For me, the biggest question surrounding Pirates of the Caribbean 5 was, “wait, aren’t they on like number four or seven or nine?”
For others, presumably, it was the title. Director Gore Verbinski gave way to Rob Marshall after the third installment, who has in turn given way to Norwegian directors Joachim Rønning and Espen Sandberg of Kon-Tiki, for the fifth installment, scheduled for 2015. This week, fresh off a run-in with a møøse that bit my sister, Rønning and Sandberg told ThisIsInfamous that the title of the fifth film will be…
Dead Man’s Wank? 20,000 Fatigues Under the Sea? The Seven Seas of Snooze? All A-Bored? Davey Jone’s Paycheck? The Curse of the Hack Producer? Treasure Whyland? Blackbeard’s Shart? The Quest for Apathy? Johnny Depp’s Yacht? One Long Reaction Shot? Yo Ho Yo Ho Oh God Why Are We Still Making These?
Say goodbye to PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN 5…
And hello to PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES.
Damn, I was so close. Oh well, as long as Johnny Depp hands the reins of the franchise to Taylor Lautner I’ll be happy.