Because FilmDrunk is a very important site, we get offered exclusives like premiering the first images from Tasha’s Pony Tales, a full-length adult film from Tasha Reign’s Reign Productions aimed at the Brony crowd (that is, male fans of My Little Pony – yes, that’s a thing). The film also features “Tasha’s Reignbow Pony Plugs,” which, as we all know, are Brony-themed butt plugs. Naturally, I jumped at the chance, because it’s not every day you get to run promotional copy like this:
From the majestic and filthy mind of Yours Truly, Tasha Reign, comes my most passionate fantasy – “Tasha’s Pony Tales.” Once upon a time, four scrumptious blondes deliberately drink [sic] a potion transporting them far, far, away to Magic Pony Cloud Land! Anointed anal-plug pony princesses, they hold court in a beautiful land full of hard, throbbing cocks to suck, f*ck, and ultimately conquer. From hot butt-plug sex action, to four-girl orgies, boy/boy/girl threesomes, and multiple hardcore boy/girl scenes, the pony princesses’ tight holes will transport you to an erotic world you’ll never want to come back from. Are you ready to take this fantastical journey?
Honestly, there are few things in this world I enjoy as much as porn synopses. The restraint it must’ve taken not to spell it “cum back from.” And I positively cannot wait for the Google Search traffic phrases like “brony-themed butt plugs” is going to bring in. Say hello to your new friends, FilmDrunkards.
In any case, the film stars Rikki Six, Jessa Rhodes, Cameron Dee, Mr Pete, Xander Corvus, Derrick Pierce, Danny Mountain, Eric Masterson, and Tasha Reign, and releases (“cums out”) December 27th, from Girlfriend Films. Really? “Eric Masterson?” You know, the least thing I’d want in a porn name is for people to associate me with the Masterson brothers, but that’s just me.
You can see the SFW-ish pics in slideshow form or on a single page here. Though one is by far my favorite:
A John Cena look-alike (Derrick Pierce) in a cat ear beanie and black wifebeater emotionlessly contemplating a porn star with Brony buttplug as a visual reference to The Graduate? My God, this might be the most perfect porn still ever. Lamestream dong-free movies should be so clever.
“Why, if I didn’t know better, I’d say you were trying to seduce me, butt plug lady.”
(*horse whinny*)
(*feeds her a carrot*)
I like to imagine that a group of fifth graders made that set, not knowing what it was for.
(Cameron Dee and Derrick Pierce). By the way, “Derrick Pierce” is such an incredibly subtle porn name that I wonder how much of it was deliberate. Aside from “pierce” you’ve got Derrick, spelled like an oil derrick, presumably as some pun on drilling. This dude’s probably an English major.
That’s Mr. Pete, Rikki Sixx, and Xander Corvus. No, I don’t know why they’re holding paint cans. Also, does everyone wear black in magical pony cloud land? Everything I know about Magical Pony Cloud Land is a lie.
Cameron Dee, showing off her pony butt plug on a giant couch shaped like a mouth, because sure.
Here’s a good look at the pony plugs. I wear one of these under my slacks whenever I have a job interview. Reminds me to relax.
Tasha Reign, Cameron Dee, Jessa Rhodes, Rikki Sixx. C’mon, “Jessa?” That’s not a porno name, that’s a name for your third daughter when you’re trying to name all your children starting with J.
Subtle.
Jessa Rhodes again. She seems nice.
Don’t ask about that metal table.
Here’s a better look at the mouth couch.
Well, there you have it. It’s a little weird to me that guys who would like ponytails coming out of butts so much wouldn’t want one on the head. But hey, it’s a rich tapestry.