Senior Editor
10.11.07 144 Comments

It’s sort of a slow news day, so I thought I’d combine a few of the trailers that were released within the last week or so that I didn’t deem important enough to post.

The Final Season (trailer here):  Hey, it’s Rudy Sam Gamgee Sean Astin, in a movie about a child molester gay hobbit douchey loser who leads a high school baseball team to the state championship!  It looks so uplifting, plus it’s based on a true story – I can already tell that this’ll be an inspiration to douchey losers everywhere.  If you believe in yourself, anything is possible, even winning sports titles no one cares about in a state no one visits.  Opens this weekend.

Moondance Alexander (trailer here): Another uplifting true story?  Guess I don’t have to rail this line of crushed up St. John’s Wort after all.  "Moondance is faced with another uneventful summer until she discovers a lost pinto pony named Checkers who has jumped out of his paddock. Although she returns the horse to his rightful owner, the gruff and mysterious Dante Longpre, Moondance is convinced that Checkers is a champion jumper in disguise and is determined to help himrealize his full potential."  Three seconds into this trailer I grew a vagina.  Six seconds in, it started to bleed; that’s when I lost interest.  On a sidenote: Don Johnson?  Really?   

Runnin’ Down a Dream (trailer here): I could rip on Tom Petty.  But then, I could also renounce my citizenship, join the communist party and tell you how much I hate puppies and ice cream.  But I’m not going to do that, because puppies are a delicious dessert and ice cream gives me a hard on.  Or was it the other way around.  Either way, Tom Petty is awesome and I would gladly trade anything about Bob Dylan for anything about Tom Petty.  Sure they’re both ugly, but at least Tom Petty seems awake. Runnin’ Down a Dream "will be screened at select theaters nationwide" starting October 12th. (thanks to Sicksauce with the assist)

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