TRIVIA: Quentin Tarantino Did Writing Work On ‘It’s Pat’

Before we go any further, yes, this is “old news,” so I don’t need 10 comments saying “OLD NEWS, BRAH” (I don’t know what’s with people on the internet’s intense need to say they saw something before you). Anyway, this story has been around, but I either missed it or forgot about it. Cracked referenced a story saying Quentin Tarantino co-wrote It’s Pat, the Julia Sweeney-starring, biggest flopping SNL spinoff movie of all time. Turns out, “co-wrote” might be a little strong, but Tarantino did do an uncredited rewrite on the film (supposedly because he was friends with Sweeney), as referenced in a 1994 Playboy interview:

Playboy: You were hired to do a rewrite of It’s Pat. As one now familar with the perspiring androgyne from Saturday Night Live, is Pat a he or a she?

Tarantino: The androgyny aspect is only a part of Pat’s appeal. What I love about the character is that Pat is so f*cking obnoxious. To tell the truth, I don’t know what Pat is. But I know what I want Pat to be: I want Pat to be a girl. There was only one sketch that Julia Sweeney, the actress who plays Pat did on Saturday Night Live that gave a clue to what Pat is. It was the sketch that Pat did with Harvey Keitel. They’re stranded on a deserted island and they have sex – and Harvey still doesn’t know what Pat is. And the thing is, they kissed in it. At one point they were thinking of taking the kiss out of the sketch. But Harvey, being Harvey, demanded they keep it in, that there’d be no integrity without the kiss. So that was the first time we’d seen Pat in an intimate situation – a smooch. There is a certain way that you hold your head, the way you come in for a kiss. And sitting there, watching it, I thought that Pat didn’t kiss like a guy. Pat kissed like a girl.

Man, that is the most awesomely Tarantino answer ever. Talking up the rebellious androgyny angle of one of SNL’s worst recurring sketches, and being so earnest about it that by the end you’re damn near sold on “It’s Pat” being the next Rocky Horror. And with a vague reference to Harvey Keitel doing something sexual to boot.

By the way, I always think it’s fun to look at the lifetime gross for It’s Pat:

That’s not a typo, it really did gross five figures, probably less than the car Lorne Michaels was being driven around in at the time.

As for actual Tarantino news, he’ll be doing a live read of his shelved script for The Hateful Eight at LACMA for the low, low price of $200. That’s right, he went from uncredited writing work on a $60,000-grossing film to charging $200 for tickets to a reading of a script he never even produced. Follow your dreams, kids.