Did you ever dream that one day Will Smith and his obnoxious son would team up with M. Night Shyamalan for a sci-fi film in the vein of Avatar? …Yeah, me, neither. I guess I lack a “European sensibility.” But for the rest of you paté-toting exposition lovers, today brings us the trailer for After Earth, M. Night Shyamalan’s follow up to The Last Airbender (combined RottenTomatoes score of Shyamalan’s last three movies: 47%), starring Will Smith and Jaden Smith, as a future general and his son crash landed and trying to survive on a now-dangerous Earth. Check out the trailer after the jump, but I warn you, Will Smith’s accent is a Keanu-in-Dracula level train wreck. It is glorious.
Is that… supposed to be… Southern? I didn’t even know he was supposed to have an accent until he pronounced “life” “laugh.” But I guess he needs the accent. I mean, you can’t have a movie set thousands of years in the future without Southern accents. MEEP MORP, YOU ARE CHANGING THAT BOY’S LIFE, MEEP MORP 0001101110111.
1,000 years after cataclysmic events forced humanity’s escape from Earth, Nova Prime is mankind’s new home. General Cypher Raige (Will Smith) returns from an extended tour of duty to his estranged family, ready to be a father to his 13-year-old son, Kitai (Jaden Smith). When an asteroid storm damages Cypher and Kitai’s craft, they crash-land on a now dangerous Earth. As his father lies dying in the cockpit, Kitai must trek across the planet to recover their rescue beacon. M. Night Shyamalan directs After Earth wrote it with Stephen Gaghan (Traffic) and Gary Whitta (The Book of Eli) and it hits theaters on June 7th, 2013.
Looks basically like a straight rip off of Avatar, right down to the character design. Of course, you’d be hard-pressed to combine two things I like less than M. Night Shyamalan and one of Will Smith’s dumb wiener kids, but that being said, this will all be worth it if Jaden Smith comes face to face with some drooling, razor-toothed jungle creature and tames it with one of his original, radio-friendly rap songs.
“My name’s Jaden Smith and I’m here to say, I empathize with saber-tooth tigers every day…”
You can tell me not all raps start with “My name is ___ and I’m here to say…” but I won’t be listening.