Opening Everywhere: Pain and Gain, The Big Wedding
Opening Somewhere: Mud
FilmDrunk Suggests: I don’t know. I can’t stop singing, “My name is Mud…” to myself. And it’s not the whole song. It’s just, “My name is Mud…” and then I mumble what I remember of Les Claypool’s bass line.
Pain and Gain
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 47% critics, 74% audience
Gratuitous Review Quotes:
“Now [Bay] hits new levels of both artistry and sleaziness in the black comedy Pain & Gain, which I strongly recommend if you don’t overvalue taste, subtlety, and moral decency. I liked it.” – David Edelstein, New York Magazine
“This crude and ugly entertainment is as crass as everything this depressingly successful filmmaker has done.” – Tom Charity, CNN
Armchair Analysis: I like how people still act all offended when they watch a Michael Bay movie and can’t believe that it’s sexist, overflowing with stupid action and greatly lacking in intelligence. Bay’s career is comparable to the second half of Alex Rodriguez’s career, in that he’s made of money and people keep giving him chances, but boy does he just flat out suck.
The Big Wedding
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 6% critics, 80% audience
Gratuitous Review Quotes:
“Many Hollywood films are founded on privilege, but few are as open and nasty about their racism, misogyny, and homophobia. It’s a feel-good movie for people who only comfortable around people who look and act just like them.” – Calum Marsh, Village Voice
“It never feels real, and its only saving grace is that it clocks in at a mercifully short 90 minutes, which is just about the amount of time you need to realize you never want to see these characters ever again.” – Adam Graham, Detroit News
Armchair Analysis: I had absolutely no interest in watching this movie until the time came to start punishing myself for the year’s worst movies, but now, thanks to Vince’s review, I really want to see it. It sounds like it’s the ultimate parody film, so I want to see it so I can say, “Nope, it’s just a big old piece of doodie.”
Mud
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 98% critics, 85% audience
Gratuitous Review Quotes:
“The film is drenched in the humidity and salty air of a Delta summer, often recalling the musical, aphoristic cadences of Sam Shepard, who happens to appear in a supporting role.” – Ann Hornaday, Washington Post
“It’s a movie that holds out hope for the movies’ future.” – Joe Morgenstern, Wall Street Journal
Armchair Analysis: