Indie

Grimes Detailed Her Workout Routine, Which Includes Sword-Fighting, Deprivation Tanks, And Screaming

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When celebrities share their diet, exercise, and skincare plans, most of those plans are, frankly, bullsh*t. Stars with brand partnerships will bend the truth to sell their products, banking on the rest of us uglies believing all they had to do to get six-pack abs was drink a cup of tea every night.

Grimes, though, isn’t most celebrities. Back in 2016, Grimes promoted designer Stella McCartney’s POP fragrance, and the pair have partnered again for McCartney’s new Adidas collaboration. In an Instagram post promoting the collab, Grimes detailed her training regimen, which includes stretching, incline hiking — and, uh, astro-gliding to other dimensions.

Her response is long, but definitely worth a long, detailed read-through. Every line is wilder than the last. I’ve been fatigued in the afternoons lately and figured it’s probably anemia again, but maybe my problem is I need to incorporate screaming sessions into my daily workouts.

My training is a 360 approach. I first maintain a healthy cellular routine where I maximize the function of my mitochondria with supplements such as NAD+, Acetyl L-Carnitine, Magnesium, etc. This helps promote ATP and it’s incredibly visceral. From that point I spend 2-4 hours in my deprivation tank, this allows me to “astro-glide” to other dimensions – past, present, and future.

In the afternoons I do a 1-2 hour sword fighting session with my trainer, James Lew, we go over the fundamentals that work the obliques, core stabilizes, and triceps as well as a few tricks. To wind down from this I spend 30-45 minutes on an inclined hike at roughly 4-4.5 miles per hour, arguably the most efficient workout.

I then spend 45 minutes stretching before heading into the studio where my mind and body are functioning at peak level, with a neuroplastic goal between 57.5 and 71.5 AphC’s (which is my preferred range for my blood type). I’ve outfitted my studio with the highest grade of red light. It is pretty much 1000 sqf IR Sauna.
Hana then comes over and we do a screaming session for 20-25 minutes while I slow boil the honey tea that maximizes vocal proficiency.

I have also eliminated all blue light from my vision through an experimental surgery that removes the top film of my eyeball and replaces it with an orange ultra-flex polymer that my friend and I made in the lab this past winter as a means to cure seasonal depression.

I go to bed with a humidifier on.

Well, there you have it. Grimes also posted a photo of some gear from the McCartney collection, which looks cool.

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