There are, right now, 43 sequels, reboots, and remakes on Hollywood schedule for 2017. In fact, 21 of them are the third in the series or higher, the first wide Hollywood release of 2017 is a sequel, and February 10th, June 9th, October 27th and November 3rd are release dates with, as of this writing, nothing but sequels as major releases. Just what this says about Western culture and the film industry is probably an endless argument, but it’s pretty astounding just on the face of it. So what’s getting yet another part, and what’s coming back? Here’s a month-by-month look.
JANUARY
Underworld: Blood Wars, January 6th
Considering Kate Beckinsale hasn’t aged a day since Underworld came out in 2003, I’m not entirely sure this series isn’t a documentary masquerading as a fictional supernatural romp. Other than a short detour into prequel territory that explained why vampires and lycans hate each other so much, each successive entry in the franchise has performed better than the last, showing that not even critical disdain can slow the juggernaut that is pretty people in pleather growling at each other through prosthetic teeth. – Donna Dickens
xXx: The Return of Xander Cage, January 20th
Fifteen years after they really should have made this movie, Vin Diesel returns as extreme sports dude/superspy Xander Cage. While the first movie was entertaining enough in its goofy nü-metal “DO THE DEW!” tone, the trailer feels like it was made in 2004 and sat on the shelf for a decade, right down the cheesy green-screened explosions. – Dan Sietz
Resident Evil: The Final Chapter, January 27th
Hollywood has yet to discover the half-life of our infatuation with zombies, so it’s not a surprise that Milla Jovovich will take another spin as the occasionally super-powered slayer of the undead. I’d argue this franchise has been the most successful of all video game spin-off films, and despite uneven entries and a predisposition for camp, there are enough fans to see this series through to the end to make it worth the studios effort. – DD
FEBRUARY
Rings, Feburary 3rd
In this direct sequel to The Ring Two, somebody discovers a movie within the notorious cursed videotape that is somehow even more horrific than the child abuse and murder that anchors the original tape. This, admittedly, is silly, but it has an admirable boldness to it that makes us want to see it. – DS
T2 Trainspotting, February 3rd
Renton, Begbie, and the whole surviving gang are back, twenty years after Renton burned his bridges in the finale of the first movie. He’s trying to make it up to the crew while dodging Begbie, who unsurprisingly has just gotten out of prison. With the entire cast back, and Danny Boyle behind the camera, it’ll be curious to see what’s changed in the intervening twenty years. – DS
Fifty Shades Darker, February 10th
We knew this was coming as the first film grossed an obscene amount of money. 50 Shades of Grey hauled in a worldwide total of $571 million on a budget of only $40 million. But with the shine off the source material, and the second novel delving into even more taboos such as statutory rape, can momentum sustain the sequel? – DD
John Wick: Chapter Two, February 10th
John Wick was a throwback to the spare, noirish action movies, but with some of the best action scene design and choreography since The Matrix. The sequel looks to be more of the same, and who could turn that down? – DS
The LEGO Batman Movie, February 10th
“Darkness. No parents. Super rich. Kinda makes it better.” Those are the words sung by LEGO Batman during his turn in The LEGO Movie. Now I’m not saying Will Arnett is the best version of Batman, I’m just also not not saying that. Regardless of his ranking on the Bat-scale, I think we can all agree Batman’s LEGO alter-ego was one of the best parts of the original film and, in a world of gritty superheroes, maybe what audiences really need right now is a movie willing to stop taking caped vigilantes so seriously. – DD
MARCH
Logan, March 3rd
The Wolverine was a movie begging for an R-rating that it wasn’t quite allowed to have. But now that Deadpool made a mint, James Mangold, Jackman, and Patrick Stewart are allowed to strip the X-Men franchise down to its most basic elements and let Logan stab the hell out of people. It’s exciting that the most powerful moments in the trailer are the acting, not the fighting. Logan might finally be the Wolverine movie we’ve been waiting for. – DS
Kong: Skull Island, March 10th
If you had asked my thoughts on this reboot before the latest trailer, I’d have had a very different response. But the marketing team behind Kong: Skull Island have done their job well on selling the idea of a forgotten island full of giant monsters and ancient ruins. The Apocalypse Now feel combined with the half-crazed acting of John C. Reilly looks likely to elevate the material beyond a cash-grab off a latent pop culture icon. – DD
Beauty and the Beast (2017), March 17th
Disney has had a lot of success with live-action remakes of is classic animated films. From straight adaptations like Cinderella to new angles as in Maleficent, the golden touch of the Mouse House shows no sign of slowing down. And with Emma Watson playing the brainy Belle, not even a slightly wonky CGI Beast (who probably will look better on the big screen than in television ads) will keep the masses away. – DD
APRIL
Smurfs: The Lost Village, April 7th
The first reaction to this movie has been “Obviously they made it for the money.” But Smurfs 2 made about $350 million at the box office, compared the first one’s $560 million. Kids need movies too, but it doesn’t seem like they wanted this one, and it looks roughly as good as any episode of the old TV series. – DS
The Fate of the Furious, April 14th
This franchise is immune to audience opinion at this point. The original Point Break knock-off has somehow spiraled into a vast operatic action drama that rakes in billions no matter how absurd it gets. But the fact that the posters and trailer are acting like Vin Diesel and The Rock are breaking up their marriage instead of having a disagreement involving destroying millions of dollars of supercars alone will probably carry this to another billion at the box office. – DS
MAY
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2, May 5th
Anyone questioning if James Gunn can keep the momentum going for the Guardians franchise hasn’t been in a movie theater in the last month. If they had, they’d know America’s love affair with this misfit space family hasn’t abated one bit. Each time the trailer has played before a film, my local cineplex has lit up with laughter and coos. The latter aimed squarely at Baby Groot, who is sure to become everyone’s favorite murderous toddler when Vol. 2 arrives next summer. – DD
Alien: Covenant, May 19th
A movie from the director of the original Alien with a lavish budget shouldn’t look and feel like one of the multitude of knockoffs of the original from the 1980s. The trailer even features the killer murdering a couple having sex in the shower! While there’s some interesting places this franchise could go in the wake of Prometheus, we haven’t seen any sign of that just yet. – DS
Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul, May 19th
Like the three before it, this entry to the Wimpy Kid film franchise will probably fly under the radar for most people. But for the target demographic of kids, it’ll no doubt be another on movie on their must-see list of summer blockbusters. – DD
The Nut Job 2, May 19th
It tells you how out of control inappropriate pop culture references have gotten in kids’ movies that the subtitle of this sequel is “Nutty By Nature.” We can only assume that this means Will Arnett’s purple squirrel will rap about OPP at some point. Come to think of it, that might be worth the price of a ticket alone. – DS
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales, May 26th
While the latest round of pirate ghosts look pretty cool, we’ve got to ask: Is there really that much demand for yet another wacky Jack Sparrow adventure? True, the last one made a billion dollars, but a lot of the series runs on Johnny Depp’s charm, and that well’s fairly dry these days. Even if it’s good, asking us to love Depp again might be a bit much. – DS
JUNE
The Mummy, June 9th
It has to be said that Tom Cruise running away from the Mummy is a pretty fun idea, and Cruise has shown some great taste in scripts lately. But hopefully this first entry in a proposed monsters series won’t get too wrapped up in the idea of a “shared universe.” Come on, Universal. We already have The Monster Squad. – DS
World War Z 2, June 9th
If you completely divest World War Z from the source material it’s based on, Brad Pitt starred in a completely serviceable globe-trotting zombie romp. Despite massive reshoots, behind-the-scenes drama, and indignant Max Brooks fans complaining the insect-like swarms of undead wreaking havoc across the world bore little resemblance to the almost cerebral novel the film takes its name from, WWZ was a smash success. Details of the sequel are unknown, but the novel is thick with lore as yet untapped by the films (Battle of Yonkers, anyone?) that are ripe for visual adaptation. – DD
Cars 3, June 16th
Not much is known about the latest adventures of Lightning McQueen, but based on the trailer it’s not going to be easy for him this time out. We see the red race car spin out of control during a race before seemingly crashing. Parts of the car (which please remember, for all intents and purposes, is a person) go flying free of McQueen’s chassis. This seems a little dark for a Pixar film, but maybe the gritty marketing isn’t indicative of the final product. – DD
Transformers: The Last Knight, June 23rd
Here’s how Transformers sequels work: One comes out on or around July 4th, makes about $200 million, and goes away to make four times that at the international box office. This means, more or less, these movies have become Michael Bay’s unfettered id, which is why suddenly Hollywood is rubbing robots and Arthurian legend together. Hey, if nothing else, it’s unique. – DS
Amityville: The Awakening, June 30th
Originally this was going to be a reboot of the Amityville franchise done as a found footage movie, an idea that thankfully got spiked years ago. Still, this appears to be little more than a retread of a ‘70s horror movie that honestly is great mostly for Stephen King’s analysis of why it was a hit rather than anything on the screen. So hopefully it will bring something new on the table. – DS
Despicable Me 3, June 30th
Speaking as a parent, the thing about movies for children is that kids don’t have discerning taste. All they want are loud characters, physical comedy, and $10 popcorn. Parents just want something that will occupy our spawn (and hopefully bestow happy memories). It’s merely a bonus if the film is layered enough to be enjoyable for adults. The first two entries to Despicable Me are among those bonus movies. Minions, not so much. So it’s a relief to see them once again relegated to the role of comic relief, where they belong. – DD
JULY AND AUGUST
Spider-Man: Homecoming, July 7th
In 2000, if you’d told comics fans that by 2017 there would not only be six Spider-Man movies but three different takes on the franchise, you’d probably get laughed at. And, yet, here we are. As a fan of Spidey, I’m in the tank for this one, but at the same time, the trailer seems to offer nothing we haven’t seen five times already. If this is going to reverse the franchise’s fortunes, where each entry has made less than the last, it’d better have something beyond just Tony Stark. – DS
Bad Dads, July 14th
Bad Moms was a sleeper hit specifically because it’s an outlier. In comedy, moms and wives are rarely allowed to be the stars of the show. Usually we’re pushed into the roles of “nag” or “wet blanket” while the dads and husbands go off to have wacky hijinks. Bad Dads is basically every buddy comedy that already exists and I’m not sure audiences will think we need yet another entry in the “bumbling/bad fathers are funny” sub-genre. – DD
War for the Planet of the Apes, July 14th
You know how people say you should only remake bad movies, and yet Hollywood never does that? Fox experimented with it with the Planet Of The Apes franchise, remaking the terrible later movies under slightly different names. And it not only worked, it worked twice, revitalizing the fairly goofy franchise and making a serious war movie featuring talking animals. Now let’s see if they can hit the trifecta. – DS
Annabelle 2, August 11th
The movie about the doll from The Conjuring made $265 million against a budget of peanuts, so we’re going to have these grimmer Chucky movies for a while. Still, the plot is sturdy, with a bunch of girls from a nearby orphanage and a few nuns fighting said killer doll, and it’s hard to knock a series that just wants to scare us. – DS
SEPTEMBER
It, September 8th
Sorry, coulrophobes, but Stephen King’s dense, classic horror novel is coming back, spider-clowns and all. While Pennywise looks good, Stephen King loves dressing up the bildungsroman in horror trappings, and this seems to lend itself more to a new miniseries than a new movie. – DS
Flatliners, September 29th
The 1990 cult classic about temporarily dying to bring out your post-traumatic stress disorder and guilt issues gets a remake. Normally, people grouse about remakes, but the original had an interesting concept it didn’t fully explore, and if this is willing to go beyond that, it might be one worth watching. – DS
OCTOBER
Blade Runner 2049, October 6th
Do we need a sequel to Blade Runner? No. Are we getting one? Obviously. So we might as well make the best of it. Harrison Ford will reprise his role as Deckard, which either answers the long-standing question of whether or not he’s a Replicant or indicates Replicants age like humans if left to their own devices. Though I won’t lie, discovering what caused the downfall of civilization in the last three decades has me at least a little intrigued. – DD
Kingsman: The Golden Circle, October 6th
That Matthew Vaughn will likely never make a Bond movie is sad. But Kingsman: The Secret Service was almost as good, a parody of the franchise that’s simultaneously witty and crude and still had the goods where it counted. If any franchise can live alongside Mi6’s spy, it’s this one. – DS
Friday the 13th, October 13th
It’s not usually a great sign when a movie is delayed multiple times and loses several directors, although to be fair Paramount wanted to put this out on a Friday the 13th. That said, while Breck Eisner can be a highly entertaining director, it’s difficult to see what blood is left in this particular franchise, and whether a very ’80s idea of horror will connect with teenagers more interested in paranormal activities. – DS
Insidious: Chapter 4, October 20th
There are no fewer than four horror movies on the 2017 schedule that don’t have titles yet, as of this writing, but this latest entry has them all topped: Nobody even knows what it’s about. Still, the franchise is surprisingly durable, and everybody loves a good ghost story. – DS
2017 Cloverfield Movie, October 27th
Do you like popping Dramamine before watching movies? Me neither. So unfortunately I didn’t get to experience Cloverfield until it was available on DVD. However, I do enjoy movies with a ton of unused lore that is repurposed into an ARG (Alternate Reality Game) with puzzles, fake websites, and other detritus spread out for fans to decipher. Will this mysterious sequel, the second Cloverfield follow-up after 10 Cloverfield Lane, delve into the contents of Slusho or what really happened to the missing environmentalist investigating Tagruato? I’ll pay good money to Bad Robot to find out. – DD
Untitled Saw Film, October 27th
Yes, the franchise that launched the “torture porn” horror subgenre is back. That said, while the Saw movies were pretty gross, they were an agreeably cheesy gross, and if the franchise dumps the ridiculous premise that Jigsaw is somehow this incisive cultural critic instead of just the world’s most passive-aggressive serial killer, it might be a fun Halloween watch. – DS
NOVEMBER
A Bad Moms Christmas, November 3rd
“Wait,” you might ask, “didn’t I just read about a spin-off of this movie like twenty entries back?” Why yes, yes you did. You might also ask “Didn’t this movie come out like five months ago?” This is also true. The first one was so cheap you can basically expect these things from now until the end of Chinese investment in the film industry or the sun going nova, whichever comes first. – DS
Thor: Ragnarok, November 3rd
One could argue the Thor films have been some of the weakest entries in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, but the charisma and chemistry of leads Chris Hemsworth and Tom Hiddleston papers over thin plots. Based on what we know Thor: Ragnarok realizes this and leans in on the brotherly love/hate aspect. Considering that relationship is the true core of the franchise — and not Thor and Jane’s love story — it’s a good call that should translate to a decent box office. – DD
Murder on the Orient Express, November 22nd
Of all the remakes and reboots of 2017, revisiting Agatha Christie’s endlessly ripped-off cozy mystery is particularly odd, especially from Kenneth Branaugh, who enjoyed a career revival on the back of a one-two punch of Thor and Cinderella. On the other hand, the cast includes Tom Bateman, Lucy Boynton, Penélope Cruz, Judi Dench, Johnny Depp, Josh Gad, Derek Jacobi, Marwan Kenzari, Leslie Odom Jr., Michael Peña, Michelle Pfeiffer, Sergei Polunin, and Daisy Ridley, so star power alone might carry this one. – DS
DECEMBER
Star Wars: Episode VIII, December 15th
Disney is printing money with the Star Wars franchise and there’s no sign of fatigue setting in anytime soon. Rogue One was the big risk, being a stand-alone film within the universe not tied to the Skywalker family. As of this writing, it has hauled in over $600 million worldwide. Barring a Jar Jar Binks level of disaster, Episode VIII will rake in money and critical acclaim hand-over-fist all the way into 2018. – DD
Jumanji, December 22nd
This really seems like a way to cash in on millennial nostalgia, but I’m willing to give it a chance. Behind-the-scenes glimpses from the casts’ Instagram show Dwayne Johnson, Karen Gillan, Jack Black, and Kevin Hart aren’t taking themselves too seriously. And the concept of teenagers being sucked into the game only to embody the some of the most hamfisted tropes of jungle explorer stories is at least a fresh take. Whether audiences who grew up on the book or the Robin Williams movie want a fresh take is another barrel of monkeys altogether. – DD
Pitch Perfect 3, December 22nd
Musicals make people feel good and, quite frankly, everyone will probably need to escape reality for at least two hours at the end of this year. Most likely the third installment in the franchise will continue to blend popular music, humor, and physical comedy into a frothy diversion that’ll leave audiences humming along days after the credits finish rolling. – DD
The Six Billion Dollar Man, December 22nd
Having to adjust for inflation, the Six Million Dollar Man reboot spearheaded by Mark Wahlberg will now cost billions instead. Pretty much nothing is known about this film other than the title but if I were to hazard to guesses they’d be it’ll be “gritty and real” and they’re already gearing up for a sequel starring The Bionic Woman. – DD
