Perhaps you recall a few weeks ago when Matt Drudge set the entire internet ablaze with the all-caps, completely incorrect headline “DICAPRIO RAPED BY BEAR IN FOX MOVIE.” I imagine you do, as you probably — and I’m admittedly generalizing here — do not stumble across headlines about A-list Hollywood actors getting sexually assaulted by large woodland creatures very often in your everyday life. The important thing is that we all had fun.
DiCaprio, for his part, had been largely silent on the issue of an erroneous story about a bear raping him and how it captured the public’s imagination for a news cycle or two. And I say “had been” because this week, at the premiere for the movie in question, Revenant, someone finally asked him about it. Take it away, E! Red Carpet Correspondent Zuri Hall:
ZURI HALL: Now, there were headlines — reports coming out — “Leo raped by bear,” just crazy, over the top stories. What did you think when you… that people would even make that up has to be ridiculous.
LEONARDO DICAPRIO: I have no idea where these ridiculous things came from, and… What can you do when you hear stuff like that? It’s absurd.
So first of all, kudos to E! Red Carpet Correspondent Zuri Hall, because what you don’t see in that exchange is that she had just got done buttering him up with a question about a funny story from the set, and after asking about the bear rape she quickly transitioned into chatting about Oscar buzz. Classic sandwiching, hiding the tough question between two pieces of fluff. Take note, journalism students.
But more importantly, regarding Leo’s answer… I mean, yeah. What can you do? Think about that. You wake up one morning, roll out of bed, grab your phone to check your Twitter feed and waaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiit a minute, everyone is saying you got raped by a bear. It must be so strange. Like, you don’t want to call a press conference and be all “Contrary to popular reports, I was not raped by a bear, on film or otherwise, at any point in my life,” because someone would probably hear you say that and think, “Hmm, he’s pushing pretty hard on this, almost like he was assaulted by a bear and is trying to hide it.” It’s really just a lose-lose. For you, I mean. Still a blast for the rest of us.