In honor of the awesomeness that is the Stanley Cup Finals, let us turn our eyes to another form of hockey: underwater hockey, also called Octopush. The sport is popular in the U.K. and several college campuses, two places that are famous for generating terrible ideas.
As you can surely see, there are some obvious problems with the sport, as it has retained none of the violence of its ice-skating parent. Personally, I think if the sport's advocates want to grow the fan base, it'll need to look a lot more like that underwater fight scene in Thunderball, with mask-pulling, diving knives, and harpoon guns. Or hell, at least put some sharks in the water. They can even be little sharks, as long as they're hungry.
Sharks with frigging laser beams!
(It had to be said)
I assume pissing in the pool is a gross misconduct?
Swimming and hockey: a perfect blending of Tom Mees’ favorite activities.
I know – I’m going to hell, but if I didn’t say it, someone else would have.
As long as they’re not flying sharks. Then we couldn’t even play ice hockey in peace.
I appreciate the “sorry about the dudes in speedos” tag. Apology accepted.
Wasn’t this in An Inconvenient Truth to describe what will happen to ice hockey after Greenland melts?
i lasted about 6 seconds before my “that’s retarded” alarm went off.
Don’t let Clint Malarchuk in the pool.
Nothing a bucket of pistol shrimp won’t liven up.
“as it has retained none of the violence of its ice-skating parent.”
They could get violent. My brothers and I used to have fight sessions underwater. Anything goes as long as the punch or kick is thrown while underwater. I once carved my brothers back up with a hang nail I had on my big toe. That and the “water noodle” beatdowns got violent on occasion. Try taking one of those styrofoam sumbitches to the nose at full swing speed.
ha! my roommate sent me this link. I actually play…its pretty sweet.
Not going to lie, the kids in the video look like sea monkeys. The game is a bit faster with swimmers/adults.
I did an interview for comcast, [video.google.com]
…for anyone interested.
Water Polo is not amused.
Nice plug, Illinistylee.
One question – are those regulation Knock-Hockey sticks? Are roller coasters legal? Thumbsies?
Ace…my alarm screamed past the “that’s retarded” section and landed immedately into “holy fuck, that is seriously gay-tarded”
Fuck Thunderball, how about the underwater cowboy fistfight from “Top Secret!”? Possibly Val Kilmer’s best movie, though “Salton Sea” was pretty sweet.
There should be an oxygen tank in the center as an air supply. An oxygen tank filled with bees.