From Fister Roboto To Cyborg Katya: Chronicling ‘Archer’s’ Krieger-Fueled Takes On Technology

I don’t even want to give away as much as this week’s episode preview does, so let me just say that tomorrow night’s all-new Archer is, um, technology driven. By Doctor Krieger standards anyway. Which means questionable ethics, questionable science, questionable nurse choice, and — of course — the awakening of Archer’s crippling fear of machines. Just let the banner image do your imagining for you.

So for a primer our friends at Floyd County were Fort Kickass enough to help me research the show’s extensive and colorful history with all forms of science and technology, most of which is Krieger-related. You know, just in case a discussion about fisting robots breaks out at your next dinner party. In chronological order…

In Season 1’s “Killing Utne” we get our first ever glimpse into Krieger’s totally sane experimentation habits during routine. And the Archer universe was never the same.

In the Season 1 finale, “Dial M for Mother” we meet another of Doctor Krieger’s most practical inventions. Spoiler: it’s far superior to being choked by a child.

Also in “Dial M for Mother” the Russians implant a microchip in Sterling’s brain that makes him want to kill Malory. In the process grilled cheese requests were forever changed.

In Season 2’s “Movie Star” Archer controls Krieger Sniper Bots that Lana shoots down to impress Lana’s amazing movie star shadow, Rona Thorne. Seriously, what is that voice?

In Season 2’s “Tragical History” Cyril loads George Spelvin’s computer virus into the ISIS mainframe and we’re greeted with the finest pirate-parrot computer virus tune the world has ever known.

Also in “Tragical History” we’re introduced for the first time to Krieger’s hologram girlfriend, who “is so real the State of New York is allowing him to legally marry her.”

In Season 2’s “A Going Concern” Archer discovers the Russian microchip and has Krieger insert it into ODIN’s Len Trexler in order to make Len fall out of love with Malory. No rabbits were hurt in the making of this episode.

In Season 2’s finale, “Double Trouble,” the KGB make Barry Dylan a cyborg and Cyborg Barry exacts his revenge on Archer by crashing Archer’s wedding and killing the bride. Classic Barry.

In Season 3’s “El Contador” Pam hallucinates Ray as a wheeled gundam after drinking Krieger’s special “tea” in order to pass a company drug test. This needs an action figure, like yesterday.

In Season 3’s “Drift Problem” Sterling receives a birthday spy car, complete with a sexy female computer voice that narrates the Dodge Challenger’s features, including guns, being bulletproof, and a fully stocked dashboard bar. It’s not an El Camino but it did the trick for a very brief period of time.

In Season 3’s “Skin Game” Krieger reveals to Archer that he has resurrected Katya as a cyborg. And vagina sink cleaning follows. Yup.

Consider yourself prepared for tomorrow night.