While there was a period of time when Seinfeld‘s George Costanza was unemployed and lived with his parents, he, remarkably, had 47 ladyloves over the course of the show’s nine seasons. Yes, the man who created a fake charity to avoid buying Christmas gifts for his co-workers and who built a bed under his desk convinced 47 women to date him. Television magic.
While much has been said about Jerry’s also impressive list of partners, we decided to look into what happened to some of the women who played the women that went out with the Lord of the Idiots.
Maggie Wheeler – Cynthia
Wheeler appeared in the season three episode “The Fix Up” as Cynthia, a friend of Elaine’s who has a pregnancy scare after she and George have sex in his kitchen during their first date. George is thrilled that he’s got swimmers, only to later be crushed when he finds out Cynthia’s not actually expecting.
Wheeler is probably best known as Chandler’s nasally, on-again-off-again girlfriend Janice on Friends. She’s had recurring arcs on shows like Ellen, Californication and Everybody Loves Raymond, and does regular voice work. In terms of personal life, Wheeler has been married to Daniel Borden Wheeler since 1990, and the couple shares two children.
Heidi Swedberg – Susan
Recent revelations have shined a little light on why Swedberg, who played George’s fiancée Susan Ross for 28 episodes, was killed off by licking toxic glue on the envelopes of the wedding invites he picked out.
After Seinfeld, Swedberg had bit parts and guest roles on a variety of TV shows including Gilmore Girls, ER and Bones. Her last credited appearance was in 2010. The 49-year-old now plays and teaches ukulele full-time. Yeah, the little-stringed instrument from Hawaii. She performs as Heidi Swedberg and The Sukey Jump Band, with whom she’s released a CD and regularly plays at kid’s music festivals.
Megan Mullally – Betsy
Mullally appeared as Betsy in the fourth season episode called “The Implant,” which features the infamous double-dip incident.
The now-56-year-old has had incredible success since her stint as George’s plus one. She’s best known as the hilariously horrendous Karen Walker on Will & Grace. Other resumé highlights include Lydia Dunfree on Party Down, Franny Marshall on Web Therapy, and Chief on Children’s Hospital. Oh, and she’s one-half of America’s coolest couple.
Christa Miller – Paula
Christa Miller’s Paula, in season six’s “The Doodle,” gives George some serious body confidence issues after he sees an “ugly” drawing she does of him. When Paula tells Elaine she likes George despite his looks, that puts him over the edge.
Miller’s been a regular on television ever since, and has been top-billed on a series since 1995. First, she was Kate O’Brien on The Drew Carey Show, then, in 2001, she started appearing as Jordan on Scrubs. She starred as Ellie on Courteney Cox’s infamously poorly titled Cougar Town, which just wrapped up earlier this year. She’s married to Bill Lawrence, the creator of both Scrubs and Cougar Town (so, ya know, nepotism + awesomeness = employment).
Illeana Douglas – Loretta
The idea of George juggling more than one women is laughable, but in season nine’s “The Strongbox,” he can’t seem to shake the affection for two beauties. In an attempt to get one girlfriend to break up with him, George tries to get caught cheating on her with Loretta, played by Illeana Douglas.
Douglas has been in everything. From Nicholas Sparks‘ rom-coms (Message in a Bottle) to multiple Law & Orders and even
Entourage. The actress has several projects lined up for the end of this year and already into next, including a movie where a woman’s cat and dog turn into her ideal suitors. I’ve already pre-ordered tickets on Fandango.
Jessica Tuck – Bonnie
In season six’s “The Label Maker,” George dates Bonnie (Jessica Tuck), a woman who’s male roommate brings out Koko’s insecurities. Long story short, George ends up proposing a devil’s threesome, and Bonnie’s on board.
Tuck, 52, has worked steadily in television since her 1995 appearance, appearing on NYPD Blue, Murder One, and Millennium all in the late ’90s. More recently, Tuck gave Disney a try in High School Musical 3, and joined the Shonda crew in Scandal, Grey’s Anatomy, and Private Practice. True Blood fans will recognize her as Nan Flanagan, but she’s also worked extensively in soap operas.
Lisa Edelstein – Karen
Lisa Edelstein had a two-episode arc in Seinfeld‘s fifth season as Karen. George’s insecurities once again became a third party in the relationship, and the Costanzman accused Karen of faking her orgasms.
Edelstein, 49, is best known as Dr. Lisa Cuddy on medical drama House from 2004 to 2011. The role wasn’t her first recurring part, however. From ’99 to 2000, she was Laurie on The West Wing, and then from 2000 to 2001, she played Cindy on Ally McBeal. Post-House, she’s appeared on several network dramas (Scandal, like Tuck), and is now starring as Abby, a single woman in her 40’s on Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce.
Marisa Tomei – Marisa Tomei
Tomei was already an Oscar-winner when she appeared in season seven’s “The Cadillac,” so Seinfeld, who co-wrote the episode, decided to have her play a version of herself. Tomei’s Seinfeld alter ego has a thing for short, bald men, so George considers cheating on Susan for the chance at a Hollywood romance. When Tomei finds out he’s engaged, however, she delivers a swift punch to his face.
Tomei’s gone on to receive two more nods from the Academy, but hasn’t yet wrangled another trophy. The actress has transitioned from ’90s rom-com regular to comedy and drama staple. Some recent highlights include 2011’s The Lincoln Lawyer with Matty M., Crazy, Stupid, Love, and in Trainwreck‘s movie within a movie. She’s signed on for 2016’s The Big Short, a drama about an economic meltdown with an unbelievable cast (Bale, Pitt, Gosling, Carell, Leo).
Melora Walters – Jane
Ah, the “shrinkage” debacle. In season five, the crew travels to the Hamptons for the weekend, only to have Jerry’s girlfriend Rachel catch Georgie in the nude. George’s embarrassed about his member being smaller than average due to pool time, but he couldn’t stop Rachel from revealing the teeny weenie to Jane, played by Walters.
Walters, 54, is a mother of two with nearly 80 acting credits under her belt. After Boogie Nights, she starred in the Academy Award-nominated film Cold Mountain and The Butterfly Effect. She played Wanda on HBO’s polygamist drama Big Love for 43 episodes and already has three movies in post-production for 2015. In 2016’s Odious, she’ll explore the child sex trafficking world of Los Angeles.
Michelle Forbes – Julie
“How does a person who has nothing to do with the big salad claim responsibility for that salad and accept the thank you under false pretenses?”
Forbes played Julie, George’s girlfriend who dared take responsibility for purchasing a “big salad” for Elaine. Forbes, 50, has, thankfully, moved on from her salad-credit thievery.
She spent two years on late ’90s drama Homicide: Life on the Street before joining 24 for 18 episodes in 2002. She was also on Prison Break, briefly in The Walking Dead, and, like Tuck, spent time on True Blood. More recent roles include Mitch Larsen on The Killing, Gail in Chicago Fire, and Helen on The Returned. Look for her in the last Hunger Games installment this November.
Suzanne Cryer – Marcy
In Seinfeld‘s eighth season, Suzanne Cryer played George’s girlfriend Marcy who, yada yada yada, sex.
Today, Suzanne, who got her education at Yale, stars in HBO’s tech comedy Silicon Valley as Laurie, the head of a venture capital firm. Like George’s other ladies, she’s appeared on Grey’s Anatomy, Criminal Minds, and even The Drew Carey Show. She’s probably best known as one of the girls (not THE girl) on Ryan Reynolds’ comedy Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place.