John Oliver Is Here To Help You Revise Those New Year’s Resolutions You’ve Already Failed To Keep

John Oliver has once again popped his head up from his extended holiday hiatus on Last Week Tonight to discuss New Year’s resolutions, which he says are “the exact middle ground between lying to yourself, and lying to other people.” The problem with New Year’s resolutions, as he explains, is that they’re prone to immediately setting yourself up for failure from the beginning. Who among us hasn’t let ourselves down already? My resolution, only a “resolution” in the loosest sense, which was to catch up on Making a Murderer by the time I had to go back to work. At the time of this writing, I have now watched three episodes.

But take exercise for example, a classic resolution. So, “instead of beating yourself up because you haven’t gone to the gym yet, simply lower your standards for what counts as exercise to anything that brings your heart rate up.” On the flip side of the coin, you can always set your resolutions to a completely unattainable goal, so then when you don’t accomplish them, you won’t feel too bad about yourself. Because when it comes down to it, isn’t just “managing disappointment” what New Year’s resolutions are really all about?

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