UPROXX 20: Iliza Shlesinger Likes Fruity Drinks, And Her Ex-Boyfriend Took Her To An ‘Amazing’ Nickelback Concert

Iliza Shlesinger is a comic probably best known for being the winner of the sixth season of NBC’s Last Comic Standing. You may have also seen Shlesinger perform in her stand-up special for Netflix, War Paint. Currently, she has a new stand-up special available on Netflix titled Freezing Hot.

Iliza was nice enough to take a few minutes out of her busy schedule recently to answer a few questions from us.

1. You walk into a bar. What do your order from the bartender?

Something fruity. Years of Amaretto sours in college trained my stomach to handle a lot of sugar. If they don’t have a cocktail menu, I go Moscow Mule or vodka soda with lime (Moscow Mule’s less complicated but still Russian cousin) and a shot of Tequila because time’s a waistin’!

2. Who’s your favorite person to follow on Twitter?

I look to Twitter as a distraction between real life events. I like anything that makes me laugh out loud, which in my case is just me quietly saying to myself, “That’s funny.” Actually, I had to go look who I follow to answer this question and I discovered a whole bunch of people I was following and I didn’t know why, so I unfollowed. It was cleansing. I love @GSElevator, elitist comedy gold. I like @snorklhuahua @boobsradley and @ABCSharkTank, not because of the feed, but because I love Shark Tank. Oh and of course, @TheOnion. Oh, and I cower in the presence of @coffee_dad ‘s commitment.

3. What’s currently waiting for you on your DVR/TiVO?

Last episode of Downton (those who know just call it Downton, not Downton Abbey), the rest of HOC, RuPaul’s Drag Race, Last Week Tonight, Shark Tank and The Profit. I have varying interests. I had Frasier on there but all the space got eaten up too quickly.

4. It’s your last meal — what are you going out with?

Tears.

5. What websites do you visit on a regular basis?

Dlisted.com, not for the celebrity gossip but for the writer, Michael K. He’s a comedic genius. I want to say impressive sites, but really I spend the majority of my web time refreshing my Twitter page. That’s where I get my news. It’s the only site where I can curate what sources I’m exposed to and I decide what I want to see.

6. What’s the most frequently played song on your mobile device?

I don’t listen to music on my phone. I think people who walk around with headsets on are more likely to get hit by cars, it’s an oblivious way to exist. I prefer to walk around staring at my screen. Now that’s living!

7. The first face that comes to mind when you think “punchable?”

Like a scrunchy face with all of it’s features sort of pulled inward, like when you use the squeeze filter in PhotoBooth on your Mac. I just realized you meant like an actual person who I’d want to punch. I’m gonna go with my first answer.

8. What’s the last thing you Googled?

“Weather in Delaware.” I’m here right now playing U of Delaware and it’s freezing. Remember the painting Washington Crossing The Delaware? It looks exactly like that.

9. Dogs or cats?

Whichever you feel will pay you back the quickest.

10. Best concert of your life was…?

Okay, I want to be rewarded for my honesty on this one. I don’t go to many concerts and I don’t think the memory of seeing Blink-182 in high school is comparable to any recent one so… I am going to tell you that an ex-boyfriend is friends with this band and he asked me to go with him years ago. I reluctantly went and they were amazing live, great pyrotechnics and excellent performers. That band… was Nickelback. Do your worst! I wanted to say Britney Spears, but she was half asleep the whole time, total waste of a drive to Staples Center.

(EDITOR’S NOTE: Iliza reportedly once dated former NHL goalie Jamie McLennan. He said in a 2006 interview that his favorite band was Nickelback. So it’s probably safe to assume that it was McLennan who took her to the Nickelback concert.)

11. What book are you most likely to give as a gift?

I wouldn’t. That’s a pretentious thing to do. “Here, I’d really like you to spend the next few weeks reading up on something I think would benefit you even though I could be a total crazy person.” No, get them a Sephora gift card and move on.

12. What’s the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you?

My mom made sure I had everything I needed growing up, even if it wasn’t easy to afford. She made sure I had every opportunity, paid for my college and helped me when I moved to LA. It’d be a real jerk move for me to overlook that.

13. South Park or Family Guy?

Both provide such genius social commentary! I go Family Guy. That being said, simply hearing someone describe a South Park episode can make me laugh.

14. You have an entire day to do whatever you want. What would you do?

I fly to Paris, I eat all the macarons, I come home. Maybe I go to the gym, but I definitely don’t shower because it’s MY day! I drive through L.A. with no traffic, not going anywhere, just to drive and not be annoyed. In all honesty I’d probably sleep for most of it.

15. What movie can you not resist watching if it’s on?

Doesn’t everyone say Shawshank Redemption? Is any other movie ever on? That’s the only one, right?

16. The sports team or teams you’re most passionate about?

Zzzzzzzz

17. Where did you eat the best meal of your life?

Toss up between The French Laundry and Ristorante Piperno in Rome. Fun fact, I haven’t had a full meal in six years, since I adopted my dog, at least one bite always goes to her, those are the meals I enjoy the most.

18. The last movie you saw in a theater?

Birdman.

19. Who was your first celebrity crush?

Michael Jackson, but I was like 8, and it wasn’t sexual… How could it be? I want to go on record as saying that I loved Jake Gyllenhaal before everyone else did, talking back in ’02. I was first aboard that train! I also had a picture of Jimmy Fallon on a vision board I made in high school which, in my visits to his show, I’ve never revealed.

20. What would you cook if Nic Cage was coming to your house for dinner?

Same thing I’d cook if any man were coming over: delivery.

PREVIOUSLY: Dan Cummins.

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