Krystal Smith Is The Next Kurt Warner
Ha Ha, 'Live to Dance' Canceled

The Spirit stars Josh Hartnett’s mustache now

By / 02.16.11

I saw this trailer for Bunraku the other day and didn’t really think anything of it, mainly because all I could think was, “DAMN YOU, JOSH HARTNETT! OPEN YOUR DAMNED EYES, YOU’RE GOING TO RUN INTO SOMETHING!”

But GammaSquad was able to squint past the squintiness and reveal the real story: this flaming pile cost $25 million and already played the Toronto Film Festival.  It stars a dreadlocked Ron Perlman, looking very Battlefield Earth, Demi Moore, Woody Harrelson, and Josh Harnett with a cat turd on his lip (maybe that’s why he squints — “Shhh, I think I smell somethin’…”).

In a world with no guns, a mysterious drifter (Hartnett), a young samurai [Gackt], and a bartender (Harrelson) plot revenge against a ruthless leader (Perlman) and his army of thugs of nine diverse and deadly assassins. [GeekTyrant]

I’ve got the trailer below, and it looks less like a movie than a contest to see who can deliver the most self-important monologue while wearing the silliest costume.

HARTNETT: “Come on now, I know you know that ain’t true.  …I can see it in your eyes.”

LIAR!  YOU CAN’T SEE ANYTHING!

DEMI MOORE: “You may walk like a cock, and talk like a cock, and look like one too.  But from what I hear, it’s all for compensation.”

Compensation for what?  Not looking like a cock?  Jesus, lady, this is the most back-handed compliment I’ve ever received.

This looks like if Frank Miller made a movie with Troy Duffy.

Because Pauly demanded it, Josh Hartnett with mustaches for eyes



TOPICS#TRAILERS
TAGSBUNRAKUdemi mooreJOSH HARTNETTWOODY HARRELSON

I want more like this!

Follow us on Facebook and get the latest before everyone else.

Join The Discussion


[avatar]

Join the discussion. or Register





Powered by WordPress.com VIP