The Rock Beats Up CGI Animals In The First Trailer for Brett Ratner's 'Hercules'

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03.25.14 56 Comments
"How do we make it so that it doesn't just look like another Scorpion King movie?" "Hmmm. Give him a beard?"

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"How do we make it so that it doesn't just look like another Scorpion King movie?" "Hmmm. Give him a beard?"

It didn’t work out with Kellan Lutz and Renny Harlin earlier this year, but that doesn’t mean Hollywood is ready to give up on Hercules just yet. The legendary (and conveniently public domain) son of Zeus is back in this new trailer for Hercules, starring The Rock and directed by Brett Ratner. Basically, the entire trailer is The Rock fighting CGI animals – a sea monster, a three-headed wolf, a lion, a giant warthog, and an army of zombies, followed by him screaming his own name. “I AM HERCULES!!!!”

So, you’re saying the name of the title character in Hercules is Hercules? Phew, glad this first trailer cleared that up.

This actually sort of looks like After Earth: The Adult Years.

Hercules is the upcoming movie adaptation of Steve Moore and Admira Wijaya’s comic book about the mythological warrior. In this version, however, Dwayne Johnson as the muscular demigod has fallen from grace, following his completion of his famous 12 Labors. Herc now spends his days traveling Greece with his five most loyal companions, who together work as mercenaries-for-hire seeking gold (and little else). [ScreenRant]

Is there a lot of gold in animal murder? Must be. “Help us, Mr. Hercules! The giant warthog is costing our village millions, disrupting our golden fleece industry. We shall pay you handsomely if you kill him using only this stick. Here, let me take your shirt, you won’t need that here.”

Anyway, I’m impressed, this looks even dumber than I expected from a Brett Ratner Hercules movie. And I saw Tower Heist, so that’s saying something.

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Vince Mancini is a writer, comedian, and podcaster. A graduate of Columbia’s non-fiction MFA program, his work has appeared on FilmDrunk, the UPROXX network, the Portland Mercury, the East Bay Express, and all over his mom’s refrigerator.

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