In lieu of a regular trailer-trailer, our first look at the Red Dawn remake comes by way of an Entertainment Tonight segment with an announcer talking over the whole thing. No matter, you can still see enough of it for it to be really depressing. The film, directed by Bourne stunt coordinator Dan Bradley, which stars Chris Hemsworth, Josh Hutcherson, and Josh Peck, was delayed when MGM decided to change the invading force from China to North Korea (despite the fact that a hermit nation of 25 million is significantly less scary or believable as an invading force than 1.3 billion Chinese with the world’s largest army). The irony of 2012 is that nowadays, you can’t even properly fear-monger about the communists because they have too much money.
Anyway, you can now add “paranoid delusions of being invaded by communists†” to the list of sh*t happening now that should’ve stayed in the 80s, just behind fluorescent ray bans and those high-waisted shorts that make girls’ butts look like horses. Seriously, have you seen what pants from the 80s look like recently? I saw an old picture of Hall and Oates the other day, and I swear the zipper on Oates’ acid wash denim was longer than my forearm. But I’m sure every psychotic militia group is going to be in theaters opening day for this one, so great job on that. And it’s got its own segment on Entertainment F*cking Tonight. Perfect.
† Added bonus: the commies are slant eyes now too!