6 Reasons Being a 30-Year-Old Gamer Isn't Always So Fun

By: 04.13.12  •  41 Comments
So, a few months back I turned 30. Yup, I’ve been on this planet for three decades — I can feel my love of Wether’s Originals and porch-sitting increase by the day. I also, like many guys my age, still regularly play video games. A few grey hairs aren’t going to bust me and Mario apart dammit!

Here’s the thing though, and I think my fellow senior citizens can back me up on this one — once you start nearing the big three-oh, gaming starts to feel less satisfying than it once did. Yeah, studies have shown the average gamer is actually around 32, but for the most part gaming is still a hobby designed for teenagers. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll always be a gamer, but the following are some of the reasons I’ll probably never enjoy games as much as I did when I was 16…

There’s Not Enough Time

For years I had a real size obsession when it came to games — the longer a game promised it was on the back of the box the more excited I got. Hearing a game took less than 20-hours to beat was enough to immediately turn me off. Now, unless I have somebody paying me to finish a game quickly, a 20-hour game can take me weeks or even months to complete.

Taking that long to get through a game often really deadens its impact. You forget what you were doing last time you played, you’re always trying to re-familiarize yourself with the controls, and there’s no sense of momentum — you hit a hard spot and sometimes you end up stuck there for weeks. It would be like if you tried to watch an episode of Mad Men in 1-minute increments over the span of two months.

For maximum impact I think, ideally, you should try to beat most games in around 5-10 play sessions, but when you rarely have the opportunity to sit down for longer than an hour to play, that RPG is going to take you more like 40-50 sessions. I can only imagine how bad it will get once I actually become a for-real adult with kids and a house and all that stuff.

I Have Too Much Damn Money

Every new video game used to be something special. I remember carrying a 15-pound sack of change to K-Mart to buy Phantasy Star IV, the first game I ever bought entirely with my own money. Unsurprisingly Phantasy Star IV is still one of my top three favorite games of all time.

I love you Phantasy Star IV.

Now that I’m a grown-up person, 50 dollars is nothing. I spent 50 dollars on dinners I eat in 20-minutes all the time. The thrill of buying a game is gone. Instead of buying a game and playing the hell out of it until I’ve memorized every pixel, I have half-a-dozen games sitting around in a state of semi-completion. Worst of all, my mind has been permanently warped by the days when new games were so rare and special. My pile of half-finished games weighs on me — I spend more time feeling guilty about not giving them the attention they deserve than I do actually, you know, playing them.

Around The Web

Featured

How To BBQ Brisket In An Old Propane Tank: A Father-Son Story

Director Tobias Lindholm Discusses Meeting With Taliban Warriors For His Oscar-Nominated ‘A War’

Learn Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Eggnog With Tyson Buhler Of Death And Company

Steph Curry Is ‘Just A Shooter’? Charles Barkley Gives Us His Harsh Criticism Of The MVP

Ben Schwartz Talks About Keeping Busy And The Physics Of His Jean-Ralphio Hair

The Nod: The ‘Crash’ Upset, 10 Years Later

By:  •  16 Comments

EAT THIS CITY: Chef Carrie Nahabedian Shares Her ‘Can’t Miss’ Food Experiences In Chicago

DJ Jazzy Jeff Talks World Tour With Will Smith, Culture of DJing, And Academy Awards Boycotts

‘An Endless Weekend’: What’s It Like To Go To The Super Bowl With 50 Of Your Closest Friends And Family?

Follow These Eight Travelers On Snapchat And They’ll Show You The World

What It’s Like To Watch The Super Bowl In A Strip Club

Nikki Glaser On Her New Series ‘Not Safe With Nikki Glaser’ And Being A ‘Curious Perv’