David Spade Knows Exactly Why Eddie Murphy ‘Really Really Hated Me’ For Decades

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David Spade has a new memoir, Almost Interesting, hitting stores on October 27. So, he’s doing the publicity rounds and parceling out bits to entice anyone who’s clamoring to read a Spade memoir on the can. I assume that’s where he’d prefer anyone to take in his book, given his usual brand of comedy.

Spade released a lengthy excerpt to Salon about his ongoing feud with Eddie Murphy. Spade says it all goes back to when he consecutively trashed two Murphy films, Harlem Nights and Vampire in Brooklyn. He cracked a “Look, kids, a falling star! Quick, make a wish…” joke during his SNL “Hollywood Minute” sketch. A week later, Murphy started calling Spade at the studio, and he called. And called.

Chris Rock eventually persuaded Spade to contact Murphy by saying, “You don’t want him coming down here. Don’t forget, he’s still a black guy.” That sounds exactly like Rock, but Murphy was not kind to Spade when he rang:

“David Spade, who the f*ck do you think you are?!! Honestly? Who. The. F*ck. Going after ME?? You dumb motherf*cker! I’m off-limits, don’t you know that? You wouldn’t have a job if it weren’t for me. Talking sh*t about me??” Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera … on and on and on and making me feel like sh*t.

I barely spoke. I just stared at Rock in disbelief. It was so much worse than I had imagined. I wanted to apologize, explain the joke, anything, but nothing came out. Here was one of my favorite comedians of all time ripping me a new a**hole. I had worshipped this dude for years, knew every line of his stand-up. And now he hated me. Like, really really hated me. The opposite of Sally Field.

Brutal. To make matters worse, Chris Rock felt terrible about the entire situation. For many years, Rock would meet with Murphy and report back: “Saw Eddie last week. He still hates you.” Poor Spade, but he had it coming for messing with a legend.

(Via Salon)

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The 10 Best Musical Acts To Host ‘Saturday Night Live’

by John Hugar

best saturday night live musical hosts

This past weekend, Drake hosted SNL for the second time, and did a great job, singing about being the subject of internet memes, and challenging Jay Pharoah on his impression of him. Drake’s two solid performances can’t help but make us wonder how he ranks against some of the other musical guests who have also hosted the show. You never know how a musician will approach the gig; Garth Brooks was funnier than anyone would have thought, while Kris Kristofferson was drunk throughout the show, and repeatedly flubbed lines. Some of the best and worst shows of SNL have been hosted by musicians, and we’re looking at 10 of the best musical hosts who brought their A-game to 30 Rock.

10. MC Hammer

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No matter how you think MC Hammer’s music has held up, it’s hard to deny that he was surprisingly funny on SNL. He appeared in the first sketch featuring David Spade’s “…And You Are?” Guy, and had to be talked down by Phil Hartman, who said, “Please, Hammer, don’t hurt ’em.” Later, he played Wilt Chamberlain, in a sketch addressing his claim that he slept with over 20,000 women. Hammer was comfortable and often funny. If nothing else, this was a lot better than that cartoon he had in the ’90s.

9. Taylor Swift

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Swift was brought in to host when she was just becoming super-famous, and being linked to a different celebrity every week (hey, some things never change). Perhaps more importantly, this was only two months after Kanye West interrupted her at the VMAs, which was all anyone wanted to talk about. Swift addressed this and other topics in a musical monologue she wrote herself. Elsewhere, she did a solid impression of Kate Gosselin, and played half of a pair of roommates who are little too attached to each other.

8. Bruno Mars

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Mars hosted the show once in 2012 and turned in a memorable performance. One of his best sketches came when he played a Pandora intern who had to perform several Michael Jackson songs when the MJ station malfunctions (similar to what they did recently with Ariana Grande). No, this isn’t how Pandora actually works, but it was a thrilling performance just the same. He also starred in the saddest Digital Short ever, playing a sad mouse who can no longer bring happiness to the people of New York. Mars had a ton of energy, and it would not be a shock to see him back.

7. Britney Spears

Britney hosted SNL twice, both instances during her teen-pop period, and she was willing to participate in the show’s irreverent atmosphere, poking fun at subjects like her relationship with Justin Timberlake (we’re getting to him), and the rumors that she had breast implants. Her most memorable moment, though, came when she sang with Tracy Morgan’s Woodrow, a sewer-dweller with a heart of gold.

6. Miley Cyrus

Miley has hosted the show three times now, and it’s not hard to see why. One of the most important questions when a musician hosts SNL is how comfortable they’ll be acting in sketches. For Miley, that was no problem, as she seemed to fit right in. In her second hosting gig, she mocked her infamous performance with Robin Thicke at the 2013 VMAs, and performed a hilarious parody of “We Can’t Stop” about the government shutdown. Miley was self-deprecating and naturally funny. This year, she sang a song saying goodbye to all the annoying temporary celebrities of 2015. I’d expect to see her back in the future, with a solid shot at the Five-Timers club.

5. Christina Aguilera

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Aguilera hosted once in 2004 — Maroon 5 was the musical guest — and demonstrated enough comedic talent that it’s a bit surprising she hasn’t been brought back (she did appear as a musical guest in 2006). The best sketch here was a parody of Sex and the City in which Aguilera did a spot-on impression of Kim Cattrall’s Samantha. She also did a great job of playing a Paris Hilton-y spoiled rich girl in a game show called “Do You Know Who My Father Is?”

4. Garth Brooks

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Okay, sure, the time he hosted and his Chris Gaines character was the musical guest was a bit strange, but still, Brooks was pretty much up for anything during his two hosting gigs, which meant appearing in sketches like Old French Whore (in which he played one), and Who’s More Grizzled, where he was sparred off with Robert Duvall, who made a cameo appearance. Brooks hasn’t hosted since 1999, but if he ever comes back, he’ll likely have his A-game ready.

3. Drake

In the two episodes Drizzy has hosted, he’s displayed a remarkable amount of showmanship. In his first episode, an ill-advised sketch about a foreign woman being confused at an amusement mark was nearly saved by Drake’s commitment. He really shined in his second show, giving us the hilarious “More Than a Meme” bit, along with his exaggerated Canadian accent on what was easily the best “Black Jeopardy” sketch yet. It seems fairly likely that Drake will be hosting again in the future. He certainly has the skill for it.

2. Paul Simon

Simon appeared on the second episode of SNL, and he’s been a staple on the show ever since. He was in the original Five-Timers Club sketch with Tom Hanks and Steve Martin, and at this point he’s SNL royalty. In the show, he’s dressed up like a turkey, and was forced to listen to muzak versions of Simon & Garfunkel songs for all eternity. Simon’s last spot on the show was as a musical guest in 2011, but he’s pretty much a lock to show up again when his next album comes out.

1. Justin Timberlake

The obvious choice here. When JT first hosted the show in 2003, no one knew just how strong his comedic chops were. Then he brought it on in to Omeletteville, and nothing has been the same. Subsequent appearances brought us classics like “Dick in a Box,” and “Motherlover.” When he made it into the Five-Timers Club in 2013, it felt well-earned, and we can only hope he’ll be hosting many more times in the future.

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