Apparently, Kara DioGuardi was on “Lopez Tonight” recently, and discussed an incident a few years ago where she ate pot brownies at Paula Abdul’s house. I say “apparently” because there aren’t enough pot brownies in the world to get me to watch an episode of “Lopez Tonight” with Kara Dioguardi as a guest. So I’m taking CNN’s word for it. Anyway, speaketh Kara:
“The maid at the time found these brownies in the freezer,” she recalled. “She took them out, put them in the refrigerator, and I hadn’t really eaten much that night… They were these little nuggets, little, you know? I take six, not a lot.”
Six hours later, “I was like, ‘Hey, what’s going on?'” remembered the host of Bravo’s upcoming “Platinum Hit.” “I fell out of bed, on the floor and stumbled down stairs… and the ambulance comes, and this guy is like, ‘This b— is high as a kite!”‘
Dioguardi went on to insist that the brownies weren’t Abdul’s, but were brought by a friend. As ridiculous as that sounds, it’s not the important part of this story. Nor is the part where she was taken to the hospital and put on an IV for three days. No, the important part of the story is SIX! SIX BROWNIES! Jesus, Kara. Save some for the rest of us, piggy. I can’t even imagine how mad I’d be if I had a party and laid out food and drink, and some chick rooted through my kitchen and ate six of my brownies. Brownies I had SPECIFICALLY kept away from my guests. She deserved everything she got.
In summation, I like brownies very much.