Keanu Reeves Is Totally Chill Even When Finding Intruders In His Home At 4AM

News & Culture Writer
09.19.14 12 Comments
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Keanu Reeves seems like the chillest guy ever. I mean, we already knew that. But picture, if you will: Something wakes you up in the middle of the night, around 4 a.m., and you hear sounds coming from your library. Because in this scenario you have a library, la dee dah! You enter your library to find some super creepy woman sitting in a chair. What do you do?

If it was me I’d probably grab the closest object that could effectively bash in a human skull while screaming and flailing and calling the police. Keanu Reeves, on the other hand, just calmly talked to her like it was no big deal.

The actor got up, walked in and saw a woman in her mid-40’s sitting in his chair, not uttering a peep.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ … Keanu calmly approached her and began speaking to her. She explained she was there to meet him. He very calmly called 911 and obtusely told the dispatcher cops needed to roll quick.

Police came and took the woman into custody. She was taken for a psych evaluation.

Was she wearing all white and smoking a cigarette? For some reason I can only picture this happening in my head with Patti from The Leftovers as the chair woman, because TV takes up at least 75% of my brain. Keanu Reeves’ home is apparently built like a fortress, so if anyone was going to breach security I’d say the Guilty Remnant would be capable. But since The Leftovers and Guilty Remnant are actually fictional, it’s unclear what the woman’s motivation was to break into his home.

WHAT’S YOUR ANGLE, LADY?

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