What’s New In Greed?

Times are hard in America and around the world. Houses are being foreclosed on. Jobs are being lost. Children are going hungry. Major countries are suffering severe disaster. And, in the middle of it all is the poor sad American millionaire, who just doesn’t quite feel rich enough. Why people with seven figure portfolios feel they’re just like those sad, wretched upper middle class types you see on the news, and why it sucks to be a landlord in Malaysia, here today at Uproxx News.

First, have a heaping helping of class rage, courtesy of the fine people at Fidelity Investments. Fidelity did a survey of 1000 people with at least $1 million in assets to invest, and that excludes real estate and retirement. In fact, the average amount of personal capital this lot had was over $3 million. The results?

Apparently a million bucks is still poverty, provided you have a total lack of perspective. Which 40% of millionaires apparently do, because four out of ten said they weren’t rich. What’s the new rich to people worth a million? $7 million!

Apparently these millionaires are worried that their money won’t last them for their entire retirement, since God forbid they do things like cut back, spend frugally, or retire at 72 instead of 65 like the rest of us. No, instead the solution is that they need more money. The need for even more millions grew with age, as apparently the older you get, the more you need money.

Fidelity, possibly showing a little more awareness than their customers, closed the survey by noting the richest 5% of Americans control 55% of the country’s wealth in the first place.

Meanwhile, in Malaysia, Zuria Ali was just making your typical visit on his rental property. Swing by, talk to the tenants, collect some rent, see to repairs. You know, typical landlord stuff. But he had a small problem when he arrived: apparently, his tenants liked the house but not the property, so they stole it.

The literal house thieves had shown up a few days before with a tractor trailer, and had just told anybody who had asked that they were moving the house on Ali’s orders. The house was pried right off its foundations, loaded onto the trailer, and driven off, presumably to be relocated in some trailer park as a mobile home. They absconded with not just the house, but most of the contents, including $10,000 worth of furniture and appliances.

The police have confirmed the house was stolen, and are on the lookout for it. We’re pretty sure it’ll be found, if for no other reason than the mailman is going to find it awfully suspicious that he has a new address on his route all of a sudden.


  • The rich apparently aren’t widening the gap between the richest and poorest in America nearly fast enough for their liking (Daily Mail)
  • Malaysia has an interesting concept of “moving out”. (Reuters)



  • In Japan news, the situation has only worsened as of Tuesday. The Fukushima reactor has released more radiation into the atmosphere, and the radioactivity emitted has reached the level of causing harm to human beings. Currently, 550,000 have been evacuated from the area and everyone within a 19-mile radius has been asked to stay indoors. In addition, the humanitarian crisis is getting worse, especially near the reactor as aid groups must stay away from the radioactive zones. Medicine is beginning to run out for those suffering from chronic illnesses, and even basic sanitation is becoming a severe problem. The death toll has risen to 10,000 so far, and officials are worried that it could rise much higher, as at least 30,000 people are still unaccounted for. Please consider donating to the Red Cross or supporting other relief groups, as the crisis will only worsen from here. (Reuters)



  • The average household income in the United States, as of 2010, was $46,000 a year. 6.3% of Americans are living on less than $10,977. Just in case you need some help with the math, whiny millionaires, a million dollars is about twenty times the average. But a steaming mug of STFU is absolutely free! In fact, it’s obligatory! (MyBudget360)
  • A nice condo in Malaysia will currently run you about $1000 USD, or about 3000 ringgit, according to a quick browse of real estate listings. No word on what a nice condo will get on the black market. (MyProperty)