When I was in eighth grade, pretty much everyone I knew had a Shaquille O’Neal Magic jersey; even in his second year, Shaq was the only NBA player that even approached the iconic status of Michael Jordan. Noticing my growing interest in hoops – before Shaq, I had primarily been a baseball fan – my father took me to the store to get my first jersey.
A funny thing happened: I came home with a Magic jersey, but it wasn’t No. 32. As much as I loved young Shaq, there was just something about Anfernee Hardaway. The rookie had the cool name, the cooler nickname, the sleek frame, the smooth game, the perfect No. 1 on the back. Not to mention, I liked the exclusivity; in a sea of Shaqs, I had the only Penny jersey in school.
Over time, I watched Penny’s stock soar to where the sky seemed the limit, and then come crashing down as his knees went to Hell. But every once in a while, I go back and watch some film of him tormenting the Heat as ostensibly a one-man team in the 1997 Playoffs and think not about what could have been, but about the supernova he was for just a short period of time.
Next to Jordan and Shaq, Penny was, for a time, arguably the most marketable guy in the entire league – this, despite being relatively soft spoken and unassuming. The Nike Lil’ Penny ads, featuring a miniature Hardaway puppet voiced by Chris Rock, were a sensation.
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“I didn’t know until we probably got about four commercials in, and everywhere I went, everyone was talking like Chris Rock,” Penny told me a couple years ago in an interview for Dime. “I was like, ‘Wow, this thing has really gone to the next level.’ I thought it was funny, but I didn’t think it would hit like this.”
The spots worked because of how different the doll was from the player it represented. Penny was not a comedic guy, but he was assuredly an excellent straight man, much the way MJ himself was to great effect with Mars Blackmon. It also didn’t hurt that Penny had the best and most innovative sneakers this side of Air Jordans, so much so that he remains a major Foot Locker factor all this time later.
With Penny turning 42 today, Dime decided to go down memory lane and check out 10 of his best commercials. Believe me, you didn’t have to twist my arm.
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As a bonus/warmup, this intro to the 1996 Eastern Conference Finals is worth watching if only to hear the tremendous NBA on NBC theme song, which made every playoff game back then seem epic. I’m not quite sure what else John Tesh has done of value, if anything, but the fact that he composed the ridiculously titled “Roundball Rock” makes him aces in my book.
[RELATED: Penny Hardaway’s Top 10 NBA Plays]
As for the spot itself, Lil’ Penny tried everything to vicariously figure out how to stop the Bulls, even sawing open an Air Jordan in a cringe-worthy visual for most sneaker collectors. He then settled in with two women and a bunch of snacks to watch what many expected to be a competitive series, given that the Magic had ended Chicago’s run during Jordan’s return season a year prior. But despite Penny’s best efforts – he averaged over 25 points per game – the Magic were swept.
10. NBA.com
The Internet has changed quite a bit since Penny was on the Magic. This early ad for NBA.com featured Penny and a few other players making rudimentary demands for features on the web site, such as in-game stats, postgame recaps – and a recipe for Penny’s mother’s meatloaf. I got a particular kick out of the unintentionally prescient typo on Antoine Walker‘s demand for “online cats,” which is basically 40 percent of the Internet at this point.
9. “That was Tyra Banks, fool!”
Lil’ Penny lectures the real thing about how he should speak his mind more, while demonstrating perfectly why he didn’t have to: He had his little buddy as a mouthpiece. The ad also features the appearance of a then-smoldering hot Tyra Banks, Lil’ Penny’s primary love interest throughout the commercials.
8. “Yeah right, MJ said that?”
With Shaq having realized his manifest destiny in heading west, Lil’ Penny stuns Penny by revealing that Michael Jordan told him he has unlimited potential. (To this day, Penny holds MJ in the highest reverence; the two play golf frequently and compare notes on their sneaker lines.) Lil’ Penny aptly predicts Penny would take his game to the next level; he averaged 31 points in the first round of the playoffs and almost dragged a perfectly lackluster surrounding cast past the Heat. This ad is also notable for featuring the Zoom Penny 2, the best sneaker in the line and one of my five favorites of all time.
7. “Los Lobos!”
Continuing the theme of Lil’ Penny being cool with everyone, he tells Penny to give Kevin Garnett his best. Turns out they were in science club together in high school. I love how exasperated Penny perpetually is by his little friend, who nonetheless has locker room access despite not actually knowing which team the Magic are playing that night.
6. Spike’d out
Lil’ Penny sits courtside with Spike Lee to watch Penny “dismantle the Knicks,” but ends up confusing him into a turnover. (Or, perhaps Penny was simply taken off his game by Charles Oakley menacing him.) Spike pitches a starring role for Lil’ Penny in a romantic comedy with – you guessed it – Tyra Banks. Meanwhile, Penny appears to travel three times in one move as the ad begins, but that’s probably just our eyes playing tricks on us.
5. Radio
Pre-Lil’ Penny in 1995. True to form, Penny won’t sing his own praises, but he has callers to a sports radio show to do it for him. Notable are the hosts of the radio show, streetball/sneaker legend Bobbito Garcia and respected hip-hop journalist Dream Hampton, who add a touch of legitimacy to the proceedings. Also notable: The Nike Air Go, the precursor to the Penny line.
4. Living room
Penny and Lil’ Penny sit in the living room, watching highlights of our hero on a television that is modest even for that era. When a terrible commercial airs featuring Penny wearing a bright suit and speaking in a Barry White baritone about how cool the Air Penny 1 sneaker is, Lil’ Penny quips, “I guess Spike Lee wasn’t available!”
I like this ad primarily for the absurdity of the situation: Penny and Lil’ Penny hanging out in their shared living room, eating snacks and watching basketball on a yellow couch. (In a similar vein was the spot where Lil’ Penny discusses Ken Griffey Jr.‘s Presidential campaign, with a cameo from Nick Anderson.) It’s the little touches, too: The first time you see it, you might miss the framed picture of Penny and Lil’ Penny on the end table.
3. Pool party
Back from a road trip, Penny skims his pool while lecturing Lil’ Penny about his house parties. The doll hears none of it, daydreaming on a pool float about playing on a team with Penny while Kurtis Blow‘s “Basketball” plays and cheerleader Tyra Banks blows kisses at him. The spot features the best line in the campaign, “The secret service couldn’t guard me!” I can’t count the number of times I used that in high school pickup games, none of them warranted.
2. “One Penny, and a bunch of loafers!”
A flawless take on Jordan’s iconic “Frozen Moment” ad, the Penny-fied version doubles the amount of time to a full minute. Instead of everyone being riveted – as they were for Jordan – Tyra Banks blows bubbles, Lil’ Penny fires off a model rocket, a little girl’s ice cream melts, some guy in a lawn chair somewhere falls asleep. The best part of the Lil’ Penny ads were their willingness to have a little fun at their own expense.
1. Work
As funny as the Lil’ Penny ads were, and as much as they broadened his audience, I was always most partial to “Work” for capturing the true essence of one of my favorite players. Penny wasn’t just a guy with a terrific little avatar, but a quiet kid from Memphis, a mama’s boy blessed with natural talent who through hard work ended up one of the indelible figures of the NBA in the mid-90s, with a name, logo and brand that continue to endure.
Which one was your favorite?
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