Adam Morrison lives in a cabin in the woods somewhere, and he kills his own dinner. That’s the portrait of his life I am resigned to, if only because I can’t imagine another human being actively exuding such dishelved indifference with respect to personal appearance. Paul Pierce pioneered the facial-hair-scraps-are-cool movement, and we’ll just have to assume that Adam Morrison wanted to become a groupie. Maybe that’s why I hate the Celtics so much.
The mustache is gone now as Morrison tries to reignite his NBA career with the Los Angeles Clippers, and I can’t help but think that this move was long overdue. Back when he dominated the college basketball scene at Gonzaga, he played in harmony with that mustache and accompanying scuzzy mane, because his game was disjointed and awkward, but unflinchingly effective. His jump shots went in from everywhere. And the hair became cool because it was so uncool, somehow – the attraction of can’t-look-away abhorrence. But there was a secondary persona emerging; he seemed to be an actor playing the role of himself. He was almost too unassuming, too unapproachable that even the star-who-hates-the-limelight storyline had no legs. Maybe he really was just an impenetrable and benign oddball.
It’s Adam Morrison’s birthday today, and it’s his 28th. I had to look that one up on Wikipedia to be sure because he just doesn’t feel that old. He’s a flamed out could-have-been, or never-was, depending on your particular slant, but his class of player, the college success story who never finds his way in the NBA, is endlessly intriguing. We ask the why and inevitably arrive at non-answers and underdeveloped speculation, if only because neat is quick and easy.
But it’s his birthday today, so let’s stay positive. Remember when he banked in a game-winning three-pointer against Oklahoma State in that Adam Morrison-meandering kind of way? That was fun, especially since Gus Johnson was involved. And he makes everything better.
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