We’ve got a lot to get through this week in This Week in Posters, including some fine example of true Vin Dieselry. But in the interest of starting strong, there’s a whole batch of posters for the new Point Break remake that are just incredible.
This first one, with the snowboard and the rifle — I realize James Bond has already combined guns and skis (to say nothing of the Finnish army), but the fact that it looks like this guy’s about to push himself off a 100-foot drop down into a rocky chute and into a cornice, all while holding a military-style assault rifle, feels like a new high-water mark in xxxtreme filmmaking. Have we ever seen an FBI agent pick off a team of commandos one by one, all whilst shredding the gnar? I like to imagine he’s going to do one of those rodeo flips and shoot guys in 360 degrees while both upright and inverted. I cannot wait.
Alt title: POINT BREAK: SOOO PITTED.
The FBI doesn’t train agents to do this? Makes sense. I’m pretty sure motocross school doesn’t train people to do that either. In fact, I’m not sure why anyone would need to learn to try to jump a dirtbike onto a plateau atop an isolated column of rock, thousands of feet above the ground. The only application I can even see to this maneuver is that it might add another level of gnarliness to your BASE jump, but even then it seems like a low reward for the risk it involves.
Alternate tagline: “The FBI doesn’t train agents to do this. Also, this guy died. Be careful, kids.”
You have to be impressed at how many action movies have managed to incorporate flying squirrel suits into their plots. It seems like they would have pretty limited applications in real life. I give Michael Bay a lot of credit for that line in whatever Transformers movie, where Josh Duhamel is debriefing his crew and says “We’re going to wingsuit in…” as if it’s the most casual thing in the world. “Listen up, gang. We’re going to jump out of a plane wearing flying squirrel suits and ride the currents of the wind while falling at terminal velocity. After that, pizza.”
Does anyone else automatically start thinking of the great No Limit artists of the late ’90s when they read this? I half expect Master P to be in the bottom corner with a pull quote. “Unnnnghhh, na-nah na-nah.” — Master P. (Side note, Master P should definitely be in this.)