Something for every-MAN in five clips from ‘The Expendables

07.31.10 8 years ago

Sylvester Stallone may have worked a few minor miracles to bring cast of “The Expendables” together into one movie. It seems like every single great living action star is in the flick. Bruce Willis, Dolph Lundgren, Steve Austin, Randy Couture and Terry Crews AND the Governator, all in one movie? Amazing!

But he didn’t stop there. If these five clips are any indication, he also filled his new movie with stuff guys love.

Got XY chromosomes? Need a testosterone topper? Sly’s got you covered. Check out these clips, they’re so full of manly-stuff they’ll lower your voice at least two octaves.

#1: Vintage Trucks
What do bad-asses drive? Souped up vintage Detroit steel, that’s what. Nothing like the savage rumble of eight cylinders of pure torque to get you out of a bad-guy related jam. What makes Sly’s truck even cooler? Jet Li in the passenger seat.

#2: Tattoos

Nothing says “Tough” like the hours and hours of excruciating needlework required to cover your considerably large back with intricate tattoos. Once only the domain of manly men like sailors and bikers, tattoos are now a little more mainstream. They still, however, require some pain and bravery. You know what’s especially brave? Trusting that Mickey Rourke can see straight before he starts woking on you.

#3: Guns
Guys like guns. Guys like gunfights. Guys like seeing bad guys get shot. Guys like the tension that happens before a gunfight. Guys like seeing that tension end with an explosion of fire out of many a long tube of gunmetal. Guys DON’T like Freudian analysis.

 #4: Motorcycles and Ass Kicking
Few action stars in recent memory are as good at the art of good old fashioned, bare knuckled ass-kicking as Jason Stratham. In the clip below he takes care of a group of big jerks  with the ease and panache we’ve come to expect from him.  All done after riding in on a sweet bike, of course.

#5: Mushy guy talk
What? Guys don’t like talking about their feelings, or whining about breaking up with some girl! But let’s admit it, it happens. And if it has to happen, and two dudes need to open up, they might as well do it in the cockpit of a twin prop vintage warplane flying over a deep impenetrable jungle, right?

 The Expendables opens August 13th in theaters everywhere

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