Celebrities only need to hold their arms or hands in vaguely triangular shapes to trigger the #TooWoke brigade and their conspiracy theories. So when Kim Kardashian was robbed at gunpoint inside her Paris hotel room, you know the Bilderberg Group group wasn’t far behind. People across the internet found every possible reason that Kim K might have been robbed, without ever landing on the out there idea that “she is very, very rich and thieves had access to her room.”
We’ve compiled a few of the oddest below.
It was all a publicity stunt
By far the most popular theory we found was the idea that Kardashian staged a robbery in which she was gagged, bound and held at gunpoint for publicity.
Kim Kardashian's robbery is nothing more than a publicity stunt
— Sarah (@SafetySarah_) October 5, 2016
https://twitter.com/real_jayd3may/status/783711311012196353
Kim's former bodyguard: Robbery definitely inside job***Sorry this is a publicity stunt,I believe none of it*** https://t.co/mZFYJNzwaX
— MAC Nicholls (@manjrn) October 5, 2016
Wouldn't surprise me if Kim Kardashian paid someone to rob her as a publicity stunt 😂😂😂😂
— Matthew Ivory (@MatthewIvory) October 3, 2016
@KimKardashian is doing this for publicity. $11m worth of jewelry is an insane amount just laying around. Sounds like @RyanLochte story. 😂
— Chris (@whitey1025) October 3, 2016
Kim Kardashian probably set up this gun point story. These people will do anything for ratings and money
— I Live A Good Life🌞 (@simplyease) October 3, 2016
Kim Kardashian had herself robbed to commit insurance fraud
https://twitter.com/russellbarth/status/782901643692171264
https://twitter.com/TraderRobertson/status/783292937094455296
Kim Kardashian robbed. Right. More like insurance fraud. Who buys the exact copy of a ring they already own and it's stolen a week later?
— NotThatPeyton (@TheRealHeidiF) October 4, 2016
Breaking news; Kim Kardashian robbery is a hoax! It was set up for insurance money, and most importantly attention from the press. #SetUp
— Geoff Moore (@GeoffMooreRadio) October 3, 2016
It was an Illuminati plot (to take our guns or otherwise)
https://twitter.com/emmanulashi2323/status/783404705745604608
The same people that robbed Ryan Lochte robbed Kim Kardashian. #Illuminati
— Frank Reynolds (@mediumpapi21) October 3, 2016
I doubt @KimKardashian was honestly, truly robbed. Everyone needs to look up what the #media / #illuminati is trying to cover up. 👀👀
— Jordan 🤴🏼 (@JAnthonyCL) October 3, 2016
The aim of the fake gunpoint robbery on Kim kardashian is turn her into a gun lobbyist for the illuminati. Watch out pic.twitter.com/m4auzqdl52
— Emmanuel Ashibuogwu (@emmashe2011) October 4, 2016
It was orchestrated by Donald Trump to take the media attention away from him
Best comment on the #KimKardashian-robbery in #Paris yet: "It was Trump, he needs a distraction away from his tax issues." #Trump
— Lars Pellinat (@Lars9596) October 3, 2016
https://twitter.com/dblanchard/status/782788948791746560
Since Donald Trump is also a plant by Hillary Clinton to ensure she gets elected, that makes this a double conspiracy. Drink!
Taylor Swift paid for the robbery after Kim outed her
Taylor robbed kim
— diplo (@diplo) October 3, 2016
https://twitter.com/briannastran/status/783368799332335616
https://twitter.com/TheOnlyZbass/status/783680835367018496
https://twitter.com/BobBeatThose/status/783376723513516032
https://twitter.com/AmandaRTubbs/status/783539002523656193
(Note: these people are probably joking. But who can tell?)
Bonus Round: This goes all the way to the Supreme Court
It seems like Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer — best known as the one you forget when you’re trying to list their names — might be seeking out the real story. During oral arguments in a case attempting to define what constitutes bank fraud, Breyer said the following (emphasis ours):
“Even Kardashian’s thief, if there is one, believes that all that jewelry is insured. Indeed, over-insured. So it’s not theft?”
#KimKTruthNow
All craziness aside, the most likely story is that Kim Kardashian just went through one of the most traumatic experiences imaginable. And with people openly wishing that she had been murdered and other famous folks blaming her for a crime committed against her, it might take her quite a while to recover from that. Some empathy might be a nice theory for once.
