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Dwight Schrute Quotes That Will Lead You To Success In Love, Business, And Wilderness Survival


What Dunder Mifflin’s Dwight Schrute (Rainn Wilson) lacks in office etiquette and an overall grounding in reality he makes up for with confidence and ambition that’s second to none. While he’s certainly the most unprofessional employee in the office at times — skinning a CPR dummy with a knife is against all HR guidelines — he’s without a doubt the hardest working. Most of the Dunder Mifflin employees spend their days exerting the minimal amount of effort needed to keep the branch afloat, but Dwight embraces his sales job with the utmost dedication.

Applying some Schrute wisdom to your life might seem like an exercise that’s likely to backfire, but don’t forget — the man did run a semi-successful beet farm/bed and breakfast while excelling as a salesman/assistant to the regional manager. Should you need some unorthodox advice in business or love, let these Dwight quotes be your guide. Hell, they even work for wilderness survival, because the man knows his bears.

“I am ready to face any challenge that might be foolish enough to face me.”

In Dwight’s world, every interaction is a battle and every task is a mountain to be conquered. More often times than not, his Dunder Mifflin tasks and interactions are generally the same as the day before, but that doesn’t change the mindset of how he approaches his job. Dwight may be out of touch most of the time and be just as arrogant as he is confident, but he doesn’t balk at a challenge. Whether Dwight’s actually ready for the challenges his job throws at him or he just foolishly believes he is, believing can go a long way in ensuring success or failure in life.

“PowerPoints are the peacocks of the business world; all show, no meat.”

Amen to this quote. Dwight knows that PowerPoints look pretty and nice with their colorful pie charts and bullet points, but they’re hardly impressive. Dwight declares that “PowerPoint is boring” and takes it upon himself to alter his safety talk into a real-life emergency situation by setting the office on fire. DON’T DO THIS. Do however, take away Dwight’s truth that PowerPoints can be a presentation crutch if not executed in a compelling manner. Now, finding a creative way to present information that’s a balance in-between Microsoft Office and lighting a trash can on fire, is where the challenge lies.

“D.W.I.G.H.T – Determined, Worker, Intense, Good worker, Hard worker, Terrific.”

Converting one’s name to an acronym to highlight their worth as an employee might come off as a little cheesy in the midst of an annual review. Especially if you try to present it when your boss is trying to confirm a romantic relationship with his superior as Dwight did when he barged in on Michael (Steve Carell) and Jan (Melora Hardin). For the most part, Dwight breaks his name down into some rather admirable traits that employers like their employees to posses. Sure, “intense” doesn’t exactly fit and “worker,” “good worker” and “hard worker” are a little redundant, but overall, life does tend to reward those who are determined, terrific, hard workers who work diligently to get their work done in a terrific way.

“A real man swallows his vomit when a lady is present.”

Vomiting in front of your date is going to kill any sort of romance 100 percent of the time. Dwight certainly added an extra gross-out factor to Todd Packer (David Koechner) blowing chunks in front of Nellie (Catherine Tate) with the above quote, but his heart was in the right place. Chivalry doesn’t always abound in modern culture, but it is almost always appreciated and not acting like a drunken ass will take you far. In short, learn to hold your liquor, practice good manners and this is crucially important — don’t be a Todd Packer.

“In the wild, there is no healthcare. Healthcare is “Oh, I broke my leg!” A lion comes and eats you, you’re dead. Well, I’m not dead, I’m the lion, you’re dead!”

When Michael puts Dwight in charge of picking the company’s new healthcare plane he picks the worst one possible. Understandably, his coworkers are upset with his decision, but Dwight brushes it off and looks at it from a wild kingdom perspective. It doesn’t do much to alleviate their concerns, but in a weird way, this line does sort of make you appreciate at least having the option of health insurance. It’s a dog-eat-dog world and in Dwight’s mind he’s the top predator — even if that’s hardly the reality.

“Before I do anything I ask myself, ‘Would an idiot do that?’ and if the answer is yes, I do not do that thing.”

Not acting like an idiot will carry you far in business, love, and wilderness survival. Of course, Dwight hasn’t exactly lived a life according to that bit of wisdom. For the rest of us, maybe a better approach would be to ask ourselves “Would Dwight do that?” and if the answer is yes, then most definitely do not do that thing.

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